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The Other Half Of My Heart
So I'm sitting here crying
And a part of me says;
Who do you think you are,
To be falling to pieces?
Do you think you're special?
Do you think he was the one?
Will you ever realize
Your time is up?
Do you think this was love?
That it’s okay to go through this?
Or do you recognize the hand of youth?
And understand her part in this?
He loved and left.
You cried and wept.
It’s done.
Let’s move on.
For once in your life
Can you be strong?
Do you think no one has gone through this?
Aren’t you smarter than that?
You fell for a smooth talker,
Remind me, what’s so great about that?
Do you remember the nights when you couldn’t sleep?
Do you remember the lies?
And the fights?
And the screams?
Do you even remember the day he mocked you?
Do you remember his voice?
And how it made you feel stupid and small?
Not to mention pathetic.
And ugly.
Do I really have to go on?
Have you forgotten all that?
Or do I need to revive it all?
Do you remember being dismissed with a flick of his hand?
In front of his friends!
You were being “spoilt”
He had to make you feel that, “you understand?”
When were you spoiled?
Please remind me!
Because for the life of me, I don’t remember.
And I was with you,
Watching it unfold.
Do two flowers, in a year-and-a-half, make you a brat?
Was a gift he told you about but never gave, make you ungrateful?
That he finally called you every other day; because he needed you, make you bad?
Is this really what you wanted?
You gave me hopes once,
Don’t you remember that?
I saw hearts being broken.
I saw your friends cry.
I saw girls being used like tissue,
Likened to toys,
And I said to myself;
“You mark my words; I won’t be put through that!”
This isn’t what I signed up for!
Not for all this!
You’re the only one I’ve got,
So please listen to all this!
Do you remember the way he is with her?
And do you believe she’s just a friend?
He’s at her beck and call,
More than even his friends imagined!
And here you are pathetic and sorry.
But what did you do exactly?
Other than give him all of you.
You sit around and worry about his health.
When your grandma had a heart attack, did he stop any of his yells?
When you broke a leg, did he stop to ask you again?
How can you believe him?
After all those lies!
How dare you say that was love?
Are you dumb now all the time?
Why can you let him play with us?
How can you be blind?
He’s an 18 year old guy!
Your parents warn you all the time!
Yes, he was the first.
Yes, his kisses were kind.
Yes, you loved him.
Yes, the fault was also mine.
I can be lonely too.
You wanted aloneness for your whole life.
I wanted company, and to show how good can be life.
Part of me is his.
I know that.
But this part of me says:
I can move on,
Should I try.
Half of me scream’s for his arms at night.
Half of me say’s; I’ll be alright one night.
All I know is that this battle I cannot lose.
Please see sense soon.
Either way, eventually,
I will make you.
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