The lowering of my shoulders,
Bowing of my head,
I am a living sponge,
Soaking up every word you said.
My fingernails are torn and bloody,
I bite down when you’re in my presence,
And I’m not sure what to say.
Any word coming out my mouth is wrong in every way.
My attempts to please leave you in a disapproval.
Your shaken head says it all.
Disappointment fills your eyes.
You watch in disgust as I cry
Your voice bellowing above me, is like shooting daggers into my soul.
An internal bleeding eating me whole
“Grow up!” You shout. “You are no longer a child.”
I stand straight, taking your blows like bullets.
But inside, I am crumbling to the ground.
Your mouth forms in to this small twisted frown,
You don’t speak,
But that cold look on your face leaves me feeling weak.
I am soaking in all the hatred, disapprovals, and disappointments
All the names, discouragement and dissatisfaction is now
Drenching somewhere deep inside,
Forming a sea.
There is no way possible to escape.
I will just never be good enough..
The lowering of my shoulders,
Bowing of my head,
I am a living sponge,
Soaking up every word you said.