I pause and play the story again and again

The restless energy stirs and pushes me out

I slip on my shoes and sneak past questions I don’t want to answer

Questions I have no answers for

I shove my headphones in harder than necessary

I take a step and turn the music up

The midsummer’s heat dances on the pavement

I turn away from civilization and walk towards nothing

It’s a path I know well, a path well worn

When I need to escape the coarse concrete is a familiar friend

The pattern of my feet is comforting but does little inside

I take a step and turn the music up

I shuffle past looming mansions built on the graveyard of a farm

Head bent, eyes low to the ground I try to shrink

My breathing syncs with the beat and my shoulders relax

In. Out. In. Out. I pause as I pass my best friend’s house

A stronger person would reach out, but instead I turn

I take a step and turn the music up

The path gives way to a section of woods

A bird’s screech startles me from my relentless march

I lose my rhythm and for the first time I look up

The vibrate colors are muted in the shade and afternoon glow

The pounding of feet running jerks my head back down

I take a step and turn the music up

Round and round I go trying to silence my thoughts

The sweltering heat pressing against me isn’t enough to get my feet to halt

Onwards I march. Up the hill, through the park

Past dog walkers and bike riders I desperately wish weren’t there

It’s all too loud, It’s all too much. I wanted to escape but instead I’m surrounded

I take a step and turn the music up

With a bend in the path, the crowd dissipates

The world is quiet, the stirring inside slows

At last the restlessness turns numb. Once again, I don’t feel

A buzz against my thigh reminds me reality is still here

A sigh forces its way out. The emptiness is too late

I take a step and turn the music up