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A Short History of Being Half Alive
i told you i was transgender through a poem
you told me you didn’t understand the definition but when you did
you tugged at my skirt and begged me to keep myself
your hair was too long for a boy’s–but you didn’t let that bother you
from yanking on mine
now, your obituary is a go-fund-me
with an image of sixth grade shirtless, smiling you
running summer oblivion on the grass behind my house
your edges are blurry and it gives me motion sickness
when we meet again it’s in the municipal graveyard and you want to slow dance
nothing spoken, but there’s a question in reached out hands
i accept (skeleton meets skin) and we go on childhood destroying,
sword fighting with sticks (our sixth grade side showing)
we keep dancing even when posture crescent moons:
you hate my music and i hate yours
so we listen to each other in silence:
barefoot across limestone,
there’s no traffic at midnight only thoughts racing on road
their headlights orbiting us like double moons
you place your hands where your name is engraved:
your stone, my scalp
and convince me to run away
i tuck your obituary in my pocket
and your hair strands get caught in my head
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This poem is about a teenager grieving the death of a close childhood relationship.