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Lose it or find it?
What have I lost?
Sometimes it feels like,
What haven’t I lost?
The dad who gave life to me
Also gave me pain.
The mom who birthed me
Left me crying in the rain.
My favorite Grandpa,
With memories I have none.
My other Grandpa,
With hope, I was done.
My Grandma,
With the voice of an angel
Now views the world,
From a different angle.
I got a new family!
Isn’t that sound?
Now my new Father
Lies 6-feet below the ground.
There was this neighbor lady,
She felt like family.
It’s sad that she left this earth
And me.
Second Grandma,
Mother of my Father
Not in this world,
She flies on another.
I’ve lost my trust.
I’ve lost my hope.
Where does it start to end?
I’ve lost one too many friends.
But what I fear more
Then life itself.
Is that I’ve begun
To lose myself.
What exactly is found?
Is it what gets a smile from a frown?
What if you find something,
That you wish would’ve stayed lost?
Is it really worth it?
At what cost?
I found a new family
Just to lose a parent again.
It’s okay,
‘Cause I found a friend.
Then, I found something
That really brings me down
It was the money
That’s all they wanted.
For them,
That’s all that counted.
Hide and seek
That was a fun game.
They would scream
And tell your name.
But, in that game
It was bad to be found.
You would try to be
One with the ground.
So maybe there are some things
Meant to stay lost.
And it doesn’t matter,
What they cost.
Shield the eyes.
Shield the mind.
Maybe, just maybe,
It will stay lost this time.
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This article has 2 comments.
This is the story of the first 13 years of my life. I am adopted. My birth parents were very neglectful and abusive. My new family also had a lot of death. All of my grandparents have passed away. My adopted father committed suicide in November of 2017.