Younger .. I started searching about her 

I always wondered if she was really inside me as I told myself the whole time

what if I was lying to myself? what if I was empty as they told me? 

when I couldn't know the answer I started to hate her 

I hated her for not showing up ..  hated her because I couldn't feel her

I started to scream at her ,to tell her how awful she is and how I wish I could find her just to lose her 

crying, spinning around , crying out my lungs and never stop trying to catch her silhouette

and suddenly I felt it .. the darkness surround her , the darkness she was made from 

the fear I felt , the tears flows along my face , the emptiness and the fullness I felt inside

she felt like a flood , a storm and then ..

disappeared