walked down the same long hallway full of so many people

my anxiety always forced me to keep a forward momentum, keep my head down

one day i had the nerve to look up and meet your wandering eyes

our entire friendship flashed before my eyes as if it were a trailer to the movie of our lives

i gave up many things in my life for you that caused me to lose focus 

my grades and attendance slipped but i didn't care because i was happy

i was where i wanted to be with the one person i thought cared

the end of school was nearing and every second we spent, he was always there

like the flea on a dog, he never left your side

for a while i was overjoyed to see you finally living out your dreams with a boy

until the summer days came and you became distant

making any and every excuse to avoid me

even when we did get to hangout, he was there or you were always on your phone texting him

i always felt selfish wishing for my best friend back

but now i realize you weren't my best friend 

you were just a terrible influence 

manipulated me into thinking certain things were okay

but a best friend would never trade me for a boy

i pushed away so many people that were real friends all for you

i bought you things

posted you

talked about you

prayed for you

i put my entire soul into making sure you felt cared for

because i knew what it was like to not feel loved at all for you

you were my best friend, you deserved the world

how silly i was

i wish in all these growing pains, that this would've been the one thing someone prepared me for

i lost a part of myself, because i assumed you became distant because of me

of something i did or said

in all honesty, i hope he ends up breaking your heart

so you feel the emptiness

the loneliness

i felt for 4 months of my life

i had no one

and you even didn't bat an eye

because you never cared

i hope you realize how much your life sucks without me in it

realize that you will never have a friend as good as me

realize that ive never hurt you the way others have

realize

i did you right, yet you still did me wrong

never. ever. make a promise you cannot keep.