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Break The Ice
I write day after day after day
All to sit at a table not knowing what to say
What use is it
To be called a wizard of words
I may wave my wand
But it will never be magic
I may write
but my words are tragic
What use is it to be called
A reader
A creative writer
A poet
I create world's
I build castles and fortresses
I can teleport and fly
I have a million lives
But it's all a lie
I'm a lie on the inside
When I don't have the words to break the silence
They call me a wordsmith
But my forge has no fire
Only cool ice slithering
And twirling
Curling
Hurling
In all directions
But I don't know which one I'm headed
If only I had the words to break the quiet
Break the ice
That builds walls around me
Traps me
Haunts me
I can't escape
I pound harder and harder
My breath is cold
Soundless
Wordless
No flow
Where do I go
It reaches around me
Pulls me into its embrace
Promises sweet silence
To write
Promises sweet silence
Is nice
It's not
Because inside I rot
Inside I scream
Inside I cry
I may fake a laugh
Or two
To mask my frozen mouth
I may smile and wave
To hide my frozen feet
I may stare at your phone and say "awwww" at all the cat pics you show me as if it's the most interesting thing I've ever seen
But I'm shying away
From talking
What does a writer do when her words are lost
What does a writer do when silence are the only words she knows
Where does a no words writer go
To a place no one knows
To a place alone
To a place she doesn't grow
To a place she smiles but dies inside
To a place she walks
Never talks
To a place she can't escape
This is my landscape
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I wrote this poem when I was feeling very out of place while sitting at a lunch table. I was at an amazing summer camp and I had had a great time there. Everyone was talking and I knew these people, we were friends. Yet, in that moment I didn't know what I was doing. I was lost. It was interesting how someone who likes to write with words could have so few to say, so instead of forcing myself to talk like I usually would, I whipped out my phone and typed this poem. Thanks for reading, and have a great day!