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No Black
There must be balloons on the sidelines,
and please for my sake let the kids be kids,
let them run around the grass that will one day
grasp their cold flesh growing in it a new lifetime.
Must you wear black, wear it,
highlight your ignorance towards my soul,
magnify the guilt pumping your heart,
wear the black I dare you.
Sit, no need to stand up and look down,
watch the clouds move on, and enjoy the view.
Rest your body the way I could never rest mine,
listen to your heartbeat countless times,
one…two…three, for me can you breathe?
With me send away the feeling of being anonymous,
you are here in my grave, aren’t you?
Perhaps it was the singular wave
a smile that brightened my day,
or even a pair of eyes I fell in love with
that made me wish to live for another day.
I carry within me everyone who I have ever met.
A few more things before I let you go,
every human leaves the earth with a debt they forget to pay,
I am not here to tell you mine, I go with no regrets,
I want you to light up a cigarette and choose to forget all threats.
Fall in and out of love, but do not ever think loving was a mistake,
loving you was never one of my mistakes, it was not telling you enough that was,
so as my casket is placed next to long-gone lovers, mothers, fathers, friends,
do not cry.
If you must, cry out of happiness,
for once I’ll have the peace I could never possess
as I said, tilt your head up, I’ll be racing the clouds.
Let there be no guidelines for my funeral,
put on pink heels and a green dress — not black,
light up fireworks and sing the night away on my behalf.
I’ll let the clouds guide me to my new home,
knowing I’d never loved anyone as much as I love you.
That is a good life.
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I have always wanted my funeral to have color, it is a very odd thing to say but it is the truth. Since young I have always loved bold colors, the vibrancy in them reminds me of Life. Even though life does end it does not mean we should forget its meaning. Through this poem I hope to convey that Life goes beyond dying, there is so much more to it.