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take him away

October 29, 2009
By shofiebot GOLD, Thornhill, Other
More by this author
shofiebot GOLD, Thornhill, Other
10 articles 0 photos 8 comments
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raw
words scrape like skin
against moving muscles and
singing lakes
that
break hugs between
two three four
water song birds
inside
the heart of the
tracheal opening
of the wound
in the arm of the boy
with the
eyes
that are openly beautifully brown
reflecting your past
mistakes with a
careful
sense of
foreboding shame.

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This article has 1 comment.

Jtrombetti1010 GOLD said...
on Jan. 10 2010 at 2:44 am
Jtrombetti1010 GOLD, Salt Lake, Utah
13 articles 0 photos 19 comments
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decided to look at your other stuff because i was very impressed with some other ones.

content is, again, awesome. love your vocab and your flow.

Personally, i think you do line breaks at really really inappropriate times that normally would be ok but because of your actual words, cut into the "flow" you have going.

but as a whole another great piece.