The room spun dangerously,
the white-washed walls
my last hope that everything I'd lived for
was not coming to an end.
"He's gone," they told me.
And I could not stop the fiery tears
that burned tracks on my cheeks
and told me I had failed.
Somehow I had lost you,
my last solid stone
in my perfect wall of life.
Everything came tumbling down,
though I'd tried so hard,
to stand,
to smile,
to build when I was weak.
Now I lay broken,
enveloped in my own mistakes,
in what I could not change.
You always said "Be strong."
But how could I now,
when my source of strength
had been ripped from my fingertips?
They told me you were in a better place,
that life would go on,
that you were finally free,
But now ropes choke tighter,
and chains grow heavier,
weighing me down,
cutting off my last reserves of hope.
And now as I sit here, alone and afraid,
I feel shattered, broken, irreparable.