I used to love you…I think?

If it turns out to be true,
it would mean that I am a small person with a small heart.
and that I am living a life that wasn’t meant for me

It would also tell me
to hold my horses
and turn around, and back up to where
I lost myself, which is a few hundred thousand miles
from where my feet stand right this second.

Is this what you were trying to tell me all along?
Is this why you decided to ruin my one and only life?
so I could learn how to trust liars from the bottom of my broken heart?

And so I could pick up the lost pieces myself
so I could make myself be the girl I want to be
without the help of those tempting ways of living a stupid life?

I don’t know what you want back from me, all the sudden.
but cant u realize that it’s a little too late?
if not quite past the deadlines?

You never kept any of the promises I kept.
Why should I turn my head back to you now, just to satisfy you?