The Freshly Made Rain | Teen Ink

The Freshly Made Rain

April 24, 2010
By breakThEwall SILVER, Wichita, Kansas
breakThEwall SILVER, Wichita, Kansas
9 articles 0 photos 3 comments

In the silence of the evening
A cry is heard-
A yell of thunder
Echoing across the city.

As it roars like a great maned lion
The rush of water is heard.
The rush of rain.
Sifting down onto the city:
Freshly cut drops,
But gravity pulls them fast,
Turning them to tears.

And in that rain,
Freshly made,
A girl stands.
She stands on the corner.
Not a particular corner.
But a corner with a house,
A yard.
A simple corner.

You see her,
Soaked through her skin,
Flashing like a
Black and white film
With every burst of lightining.
From the cold?
From the crashes of thunder?

She's unmoving.
Only so slightly.
No sound but empty
Neverending patter,
The patter of the drops,
Fresh drops,
On the street.
On the houses.

Her cheeks are red,
Her nose,
And her eyes are too.
She stands.
in the rain.
Long dark hair draped in strands,
down her back.
All she does is stand.
Staring at
The ground.

Or is she listening?
There is nothing to hear.
But the patter of the fresh

Nothing at all.

And you'll never know.

Never know
For sure,
Why she stands in the rain.
Like an old film.

The drops,
The freshly cut
Runs down her face,
Her hair,
Her whole body.

Crashing thunder
Can silence
Cold wind
Can cover

Freshly shaped
Rain drops,
can hide
freshly made


Similar Articles


This article has 5 comments.

on May. 7 2010 at 10:04 am
flipsters BRONZE, Benton Harbor, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is not fair, it's how you take the cards that are dealt that matter."
"Everything will work out in the end, if it's not working out then it's not the end yet."
"Don't let the clouds of today hide the sunshine of tomorrow."

I loved it, i agree that the second half wasn't as strong as the first, but all in all it was really great :)

on May. 6 2010 at 10:44 pm
MPradical BRONZE, Cupertino, California
3 articles 0 photos 3 comments
I enjoyed reading your poem. It's a good read, although it seemed like the second half lacked the power of the first few stanzas.

on May. 6 2010 at 9:14 pm
sparkofheart GOLD, Plymouth, Minnesota
16 articles 2 photos 253 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Always" - Severus Snape

oh. my. gosh! that was sooooo good!!! i really loved it it was amazing :) so sad but that tends to be the best. absolutely perfect :) great job!

on May. 6 2010 at 8:05 pm
babigerl1194 PLATINUM, Margaretville, New York
23 articles 10 photos 155 comments

Favorite Quote:
wat doesnt kill you only makes you stronger

i totallly agreee. also  think most girls that would ahve read it willl LOVE this as much as me. ps it would b nice of you critique my work too.

on May. 6 2010 at 8:00 pm
nikki-la BRONZE, Orange, Texas
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"a good leader is a seller of hope." adolf hitler

This is really good. I like the breaks in the sentences. Creative, and well written.