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About a Poem MAG

March 28, 2010
By inspir3d GOLD, Norcross, Georgia
More by this author
inspir3d GOLD, Norcross, Georgia
11 articles 2 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
We're all just looking for attention, to be discovered overnight. We're all frustrated by the popular ones that claim the limelight before they fall to pieces. So many of us are stuck under the radar--what makes me different? You decide!

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Most lines are the rain, smooth and uniform with an undisruptive flow
Like those walking the streets of Times Square in trench coats, not looking left or right
They are bread, feeding minds with their bland pallor
But some lines are thunder, they are lightning. They don't belong.
Their cadence is off beat, an irritation to
comfortable readers
Yet without them the poem is nothing,
It is Lucky Charms without the marshmallows.
I am the thunder, the unrhyming line
Because without misfits what is the world?

© Monica L., St. George, UT

The author's comments:
I was thinking about my poem The Storm and I and was wondering if it would be well received, because it is rough and imperfect, and the lines don’t match up with little rhymes. While rhymes are beautiful, they are often like too much makeup, fake-looking and distracting.
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 6 comments.

my.freedom.lies.in.free.verse PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 6 2011 at 3:53 pm
my.freedom.lies.in.free.verse PLATINUM, Tosa, Wisconsin
24 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I&#039;m in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into a void, and that oblivion is inevitable... and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we&#039;ll ever have, and I am in love with you.&quot; Augustus Waters

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without misfits, what IS this world?

new favorite poetic line!

my.freedom.lies.in.free.verse PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 6 2011 at 3:51 pm
my.freedom.lies.in.free.verse PLATINUM, Tosa, Wisconsin
24 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I&#039;m in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into a void, and that oblivion is inevitable... and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we&#039;ll ever have, and I am in love with you.&quot; Augustus Waters

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i love what you said about the piece, very figuratuve, true, and AMZING poem! going into my favs!
RedpillBluepill said...
on Nov. 29 2010 at 1:48 am
RedpillBluepill, East Brunswick, New Jersey
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments
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I'm not one to hand out compliments, but this is seriously great work. I love reading unique  stuff like this.
DiamondsIntheGrass GOLD said...
on Aug. 17 2010 at 8:03 pm
DiamondsIntheGrass GOLD, Martinsville, New Jersey
14 articles 1 photo 278 comments

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Worry is simply a misuse of the imagination.

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i like how first your talking about the poem, and then your talking about people.  really cool.
shelterisland GOLD said...
on Jun. 26 2010 at 8:05 am
shelterisland GOLD, Montclair, New Jersey
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rhyming is usually pointless. often it even makes the poem worse. nice poem, i agree :)
Swindlewick SILVER said...
on May. 12 2010 at 2:30 pm
Swindlewick SILVER, ..., Washington
8 articles 2 photos 50 comments

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I really like this! Especially: "It is Lucky Charms without the marshmellows".  You're right, who needs to rhyme if the poem is truly poetry?