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If I Could Get Away With It
if i could get away with it,
 
 i would push you in a cart
 down San Francisco's steepest hill
 with a squeaky wheel
 
 i would flip your canoe
 in the middle of the Mississippi River
 with the current of a bull race 
 
 i would duct tape you to a tree
 in the heart of a storm
 with the presence of lightning 
 
 i would turn you into a spider
 in the midst of "The Itsy-Bitsy Spider" chorus
 with a not so happy ending
 
 and if you survived,
 
 i would pray for you
 at the end of my bed
 with all the the blessings of happiness that you don't deserve
 
 if i could get away with it.
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