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The Taste of Rum
I trace the rim of my coloring book pages with my bare fingertips
Hoping to cling onto any chance of an escape
With every page turned…I grow older
As my soul reflects off the brightly colored pages
One by one… that sweet glimmer begins to fade
Slowly at an instant these pages become a distant
Memory of something that was
All I want to do is color outside the lines again
Grasp hold of that sweet glimmer for as long as I can, before it leaves me…
If only I could just…
If only I could
Staring into the mirror a beautiful white dress
Painted on this grown body
Like a fairytale… and yet
Dissatisfaction grows in my stomach
growing and growing
Tossing with the bittersweet rum from the night before
It’s everything I thought I always wanted
A deep heaviness, this wedding dress drapes over my small temple
Oversized.
Swallowed by the ticking
As it rings in my ear
It sings the melody of a death march
And as I take my last walk
Pounding, Pounding, with a kind of urgency
I taste the bittersweet rum in the corners of my mouth
Stronger and stronger the aroma engulfs me
Drowning in bitterness
drowning… drowning
Enclosed by fear I want to run and scream
I want to be saved.
But there is nowhere to run
But there is no one to cry out to
…there is no one that can save me
So I march down the aisle
And on my face I hold an empty smile
Just like the lonely, unhappy watchers beside me
With this smile I’m just like the rest of them..
In my mind,
all I can do is trace those colored pages of my childhood
over and over again
One last hope. One last clutch.
With every step, my memory fades
And those colored pages turn to a deep grey, blank and
Empty
“I do” comes out of my mouth, but it is not me who says it
Its Something inside me… I can’t escape
It won’t let go of me. I can’t let It go either
But at once everything I once knew washed away
And like those pages I too go blank
Left there my very last memory… before the kiss is that Distinctive
Taste.
The taste of bitter sweet rum…
Being casted up to a great sweetness
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