I promised one day
Some day
I’d color my face clear and smooth like all the rest
And say to you
What your fuzzy ears needed to hear
And that one day
That teary, yellow rosebud day
That yearbook staining, pearly white dress day
Has finally come.

One day, long ago, I had you. I had you.
I had you with a pole and a hook
A hooked and broken, a bleeding jaw
And you ripped it away
And you swam into the darkness of forever
And you survived. Your eyes were ripped out
Your face was cut into crumbs
But you survived.

You didn’t know it
Your jaw bleeding, you didn’t know it.
We were just children
With dusty brains
Just a few hours ago we were still there
But not anymore.
Not ever again.

And now, my heart bleeding,
Water on my forehead,
The kind that kills those treehuggers,
My face American Rose,
Your jaw wet and red,
The ancient pink and white
Biting open my thin skin
I approach you
Your lemondrop hair
Lollipop eyes
White chocolate smile
I sometimes forget where I am.

And there’s a girl in my head
Dripping water on me
Cutting me open
Coloring me with the 96 box of crayons
And I tell you with your hooked jaw
To understand me
But you just hang there by fibers,
And the girl, the one in my head,
Goes for candy apple red
How can anyone ever understand me?