You are the silence in between
What I thought and what I said.
I always say the wrong things
While you listen mutely.
Every word not spoken is a pin in my heart.
But it didn't have to be like this;
Your empty quietude, if we were together,
Would unite us;
Two pieces of a puzzle,
Two halves of a whole,
We would complete each other,
My ranting filling the space in time you leave for me
As you would willingly absorb everything I said
No matter how menial.
We would be unyielding,
Without falter;
Nothing could hinder us.
Even though you wouldn't say a word,
You'd shield me from the world's troubles,
Removing all my pain and lighting up the darkness
Just in those moments of serenity,
In our own private sanctuary.
Such a feeling may be undefinable
But the smile on your face,
The light in your eyes,
The warmth of your touch,
Would tell me more than words ever could:
That you need me,
Love me,
Will always be there to catch me...
So maybe some things,
Things that are the backbone to anything and everything,
Are better explained by nothing at all.
But it's time to wake up
And forsake this escape from reality
Because we are not together.
Instead, the silence is a void,
A void that forms an abysmal schism between us,
A void I feel obligated to fill
With my incessant, useless words
That are nowhere near as poetic as perhaps they should be.
I should have told you all along,
But instead I tell it to the world
Because somehow it's easier to photocopy my diary
And distribute it, screaming my thoughts aloud,
Then to say it to you my love.
It seems I can never say enough,
But that's exactly what I must do
To make this right.
So please, I beg of you:
Tell me what you want me to say.