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when memories flutter
I turn the page and try to write
but the pen won't move
memories flood my mind
as if i were drowning
emotions rage
and shames comes through,
like a brick wall
I am surrounded
but is this real or only my imagination
Coast is clear as I take a shot
the picture is not what I want
though it is as if my heart were racing,
pounding and heavy all at once
something catches my eye although it has been months
The pen begins to move, but i begin to shake
it's as if something is moving my arms uncontrollably
something doesn't want me to let go of the pen
I grasp it tighter and tighter
and heavy pain fills my chest
and I start to sob saying:
"why me why me oh God?"
it all ends and i am alone in this room
with a paper and pen
thinking to myself it will be all over soon.
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