If only I could hold you for a moment.
Touch you when no one is watching.
Love you better.
If only.
If only I could change things.
I would make it fair.
I would make you happy.
If only.
If only you could understand.
Feel the depth of my pain.
The bounds of my love.
If only.
If only you would recognize my face.
Know who I was.
Listen to my story.
If only.

If only you saw what your words did
The marks they left.
The scars I bear.
If only you realized your mistakes.
Before it’s too late.
Before I’m too tired to forget.
Too angry to forgive.
If only you saw the humiliation I wear.
The disappointment.
The fear.
If only you realized how I feel.
How I felt.
The emotional scars run deeper than the physical ones.
If only you knew how you destroyed me.
My trust.
If only.


If only you could see my demons.
How they blend.
How they are invisible.
If only you cared to see.
My heart full of longing.
My head full of regret.
If only you heard the desperation.
Laced with strength.
In my voice.
If only you learned to look when everyone’s watching.
Beyond the concrete.
Past the stone.
To the girl inside,
Praying to stop being alone.