I take my first breath
As I burst forth
From an ocean of blood
And darkness.
The first breath of
This very
Hairy baby.

I remember being
A happy blonde child
Immune to the
Atrocities of adulthood.
Worrying only about what time
Digimon was on.
Eager to please
His father






With tales of home runs
Based solely on errors
And slaying demons and witches
Safe in my computer chair

My hair color, to brown,
Darkened
With my personality
No longer was I the
Eager boy
But a lost boy.
Dreams
Shattered by reality.
My incorporeal self
Dragged by an anchor
Fastened to my life
By me.
Dooming myself to
Swim circles,
Drowning in an endless
Black sea of nightmares.

I was a romantic,
Helpless
To my own heart
Lost
In a tidal wave of
Labels.
Freeloader, emo, loser, coward;

My First Mate
Once said:
“The next time
You cut yourself
Just bleed out
So there’s one less
Emo loser
In the world,”

The darkest depths of my mind
Were stuck in mucky waters
Until a light shone from above,
In the form of my family and friends.
And I floated towards this
Promise of protection.