your eyelids creep down slowly
to veil your looking glass
and everything you think you know
slips from between your fingers
and everything you think you know
betrays you
every breath you take and every twitch
of your fingers and your legs and the
corners of your lips
betrays you
and you inhale and exhale
but it is not the same
as it was before
and it is not what it
is supposed to be
your mind escapes
far beyond your reach
and it rapes you
and it robs you of the
grip and the
control that you think you
have
your mind
abuses you and it is in
synch with your
traitor lungs that draw their
traitor breaths and your
twitching ligaments
and they all conduct a
symphony with every
part of you
everything you thought was
yours
but you are not a part of
the symphony
you are in the audience
and the orchestra is out of
your reach
and the conductor
is out of
your sight
and everything is so much larger
and greater
and powerful than you are
and than you thought you were
and they seem to draw
their musical
cacophonous
belligerent sounds from
somewhere deep within you
but you cannot find
you cannot see
the source of these
sounds or their
route or method
of escape
so all you have
is the clamor which
is somehow within you
but cannot be
withdrawn from you
until you are
raped and robbed
and stripped vulnerable
by everything you thought was
yours and everything you thought
you knew and everything
you thought you controlled
and when your eyelids are
drawn open by some
external force you
don't know what is
real and what is yours because
everything has turned against
you and proven
you wrong and
everything has turned to
fog and pandemonium you
draw a breath and
release it to try and
assure yourself that
this is you and remind yourself
of everything you think you
know.