September 8th, 1998
11:19pm
The first time we met.
You looked at me as I was in your arms.
I open my eyes and see you long brown curling hair with my dad standing next to you.
Treating me like an angle had just been born.
Life was perfect.

5 years later.
I come home from my grandparents and walk into the door listening to the two of you arguing as usual.
You yell about dad having two jobs and never seeing me.
Dad yells saying you should get up and get a job.
I hear a couple more things but not sure what they are.

Hearing nothing but “blah blah get a job.” I think dad said.
“Blah blah blah” is all I hear from your big mouth.
And I just wish you would shut up.
So, it`s just another typical day.

I`m 14 now, almost 15.
An all I get is a phone call once a week.
Getting to see you ever 3-6 months.
What happened to that perfect life I had?
Me being your little angle?
Me seeing your smiling face every day?

I know what went wrong.
You left us.
Left us for your sister’s husband.
For something that you thought would make you happy,
But just made you……..
How should I say this?

Oh that`s right.
You have just gone from my lovable mother to a total butthead.
To someone I feel like is nothing but a trader.
Nothing but a pain.
Nothing but nothing.

See the words I have are nothing to describe you now.
Because all the word I have to describe you are to kind.
To nice.
To……. genital.

See this woman I am talking about.
She`s not my mother.
Not my parent.
She is nothing but another family member.

So next time you say that you love me.
That you care about me.
Just think if you did love me.
If you did care.
Then you wouldn’t have left.

You would have stayed here.
Stayed and helped dad take care of me.
Stay and be a loving role mother.

So now thanks to you I don’t have a mother.
Thanks to you I have only one parent.
So again if you didn’t hear the first time.
Thank you for leaving us.

Because if you didn’t leave I wouldn’t be as strong as I am now.
So you leaving us was the best thing ever.

So……………….. Thank you.