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post-prognosis
June 6, 2013
your
hair
is
softer
and
your
eyes
are
kinder.
the
days
are
shorter
and
I
just
realized
the
years
weren't
close
to
long
enough.
the moments are l o n g e r
but all the wrong moments.
all the wrong memories come back:
the times when I shut you out,
and when I said things badly,
and all those times I could have
hugged you, kissed you, said something
and I didn't, because somehow I guess
I thought you'd be around forever.
and
now
I
know
I
was
wrong.
and
I
just
hope
you
have
time
left,
and
maybe
I
can
have
some
of
it.
please?
© Julia R., Bethesda, MD
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This article has 4 comments.
OldYoungOne said...
on Aug. 2 2013 at 9:56 am
I loved the emotion and everythig else I liked about the previous commentors have already said what I was goign to say. I enjoy how the poem strecthes just liek the speaker wanted the good moments to last that were full of love and complete bliss. I also liek how you did the same with the middle when you talked about the guilt and the bad times and made them close togetehr where the reader would take a shorter time to read it. Wonderful job in the spacing and the rhythm and teh emotion. You've captured a moment that many girls feel at least once in thier lives.
candlelightwriter GOLD said...
on Aug. 1 2013 at 12:47 pm
This is beautiful. I think you captured all the emotions here wonderfully-- guilt, regret, love, and repentance. (at least that's what I got out of it). Very interesting rhythm you established as well, but your poem still flowed wonderfully, good job :)
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