through the summer haze
through the burgeoning darkness
through the early graves
I make my mark
with bloodshot eyes
wracked from fatigue
and slender, tan hands
that cease trembling
sometimes during the night
trapped in my sweatshirt
that literally suffocates me
to the point where I can't breathe
I picture things differently
my hollow soul filled
warm, overflowing with content
when in reality I'm slipping
gravity has taken over
I want you to feel my heartbeat
for it to beat relentlessly
pound through your fingertips
like feet slapping pavement
I want to admit to you
all the things I have struggled
to bring to light
all along
I want you to listen
and not judge
not feign sympathy for once
I want to be loved.