first off, I’d like to say that I’m not searching for love -
I’m seeking the rare thing called companionship.

but maybe that’s just an excuse I use as a thin veil,
to cover up the cold fact that my heartbeat is cracked
and I heal it with thoughts of you

because what I really want to do is run my fingers
through your dark hair and breathe “I love you” to
the back of your neck over and over -
repeated on loop as if somehow,
somehow,
that’ll stop reality from setting in,

and I’ll get to stay in this elegant dreamland forever with you.

it’ll never happen of course: our interests collide about as often
as comets strike the very planet we live on -

it won’t stop me from imagining though, for
there’s no one else I’d rather show my vulnerabilities to.

in the end though, there’s a sharp glass pane between our naked bodies
and we’re forever doomed to walk a jagged path where
we’ll be able to hazily see each other,
but not be able to truly connect.

and that makes me awfully sad