That Day | Teen Ink

That Day

March 7, 2014
By Anonymous

That day, I woke up like any other day
I showered and went to school
I met my new classmates
Their eyes didn't see me, but they saw through me
The next day, I woke up like yesterday
I showered and passed the mirror, I stopped...
I stopped to inspect the new crack that wasn't there before
At school, I got pushed down because I wasn't paying attention
The next day, I woke a little later than usual
I showered and noticed yet another crack in the bathroom mirror
At school, this really nice kid called me fat
Momma always said that fat meant healthy
So I said, "Thank you"
The next day, I woke to a grey sky
Daddy said the deep rumbles was God playing bowling
At school, the kids told me that I was walking wrong
They said that I was walking like a "F**"
I didn't know what that was but I no longer walked like one
The next day, I began to miss the sun
It's been raining for two days
At school, the kids spank my face
I thought they loved me because daddy always spank mommy's face
That is how she got them pretty bright red lips and misty black eyes
The next day, it was still raining
I showered and put my mask on
There was no school so I just watched the raindrops as they danced across the window
The bottom of the clouds were too dark
They were stealing my sun
Mommy said there was this place above the clouds
I bet the sun shown bright up there
Mommy said that she'll watch over me from up there
But how did she get up there?
I was cold, like the day mommy left
Her body was frigid, I grabbed her by the feet but her body would just swing
I've decided to join my mommy
So I grabbed my rope
I found a tree
Daddy said when mommy woke up, she was in the sky
I let the rope hug my neck
and I felt mommy's embrace as I let go...


The author's comments:
This is from the perspective of a little boy who lost his mother. And he gets bullied a lot at school, and he witnessed his mother get abused before she passed.
Feedback appreciated because I will be performing at Brave New Voices this July in Philadelphia, aired live on HBO every year!

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This article has 6 comments.


on Apr. 3 2014 at 1:09 pm
MarkRuff SILVER, Allen, South Dakota
5 articles 3 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In order for this system to work, they have to mine our minds to get at the essence of our spirit. This is the pollution, and it's a disease, and it lives and travels through the mind, through the generations." -John Trudell

Usually my poems tend to be more abstract. But i'm a slam poet, and I feel people can't really appreciate such abstract beauty in a spoken word setting. So this poem was meant to be more concrete and literal. I usally don't like my concrete stuff as much because it takes the expression of beauty away, but I think people can relate to this more because its more clear and easier to understand.

on Apr. 3 2014 at 1:07 pm
MarkRuff SILVER, Allen, South Dakota
5 articles 3 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In order for this system to work, they have to mine our minds to get at the essence of our spirit. This is the pollution, and it's a disease, and it lives and travels through the mind, through the generations." -John Trudell

Thank you for the feedback!! Do you have any feedback or suggestions that you think will make this piece better?

on Apr. 3 2014 at 1:05 pm
MarkRuff SILVER, Allen, South Dakota
5 articles 3 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In order for this system to work, they have to mine our minds to get at the essence of our spirit. This is the pollution, and it's a disease, and it lives and travels through the mind, through the generations." -John Trudell

How do you like the idea of me formatting this in the form of journal entries?? Do you think that a journal entry format would improve this?

Enjoi122 said...
on Mar. 12 2014 at 12:23 pm
It was amazing. I have not read something so well written like that in a while. It was a fast transaction to the hanging, but I believe it was the best way to end... unless you wanted to have a big drop that no one likes.

KingFoe SILVER said...
on Mar. 10 2014 at 6:51 pm
KingFoe SILVER, Morristown, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 42 comments
i think he went from an oblivious boy to one who hung himself to quickly, but I don't really like this kind of lengthy/story poetry so I can't really judge it. 

on Mar. 10 2014 at 4:12 pm
CorinneTheCow DIAMOND, Rigaud, Other
94 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
So close yet so far

This is amazing but super sad! It's reminds me a song in mockingjay (the third hunger games book).