A Letter | Teen Ink

A Letter

April 1, 2014
By j.g.poems PLATINUM, Naples, Florida
j.g.poems PLATINUM, Naples, Florida
29 articles 6 photos 43 comments

I crave to open my mailbox,

After walking a mile home,

And instead of seeing a hollow darkness,

A single letter is placed gently,

Awaiting for my eyes,

To reveal the secrets you have confessed to me.

And as I read my name,

Written in your sloppy writing,

And tear the opening,

My fingers are anxious to feel the paper you have just felt,

Three days ago.

I unfold the neatly folded paper,

And a scent hits my tiny nose.

"You" I whisper,

Intoxicated by your once familiar aroma.

As my hazel eyes skim down the paper,

They see micorscopic water marks,

Tatooing a trail of tears.

And in that moment,

After I finish reading your words,

I find fresh, small, salty marks,

Dancing with your own.

I finally begin to realize,

You miss me as dearly as I do.

You crave me as dearly as I do.

And you love me as dearly as I do.

-Jessica Lynn Garby

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This article has 13 comments.

on May. 16 2014 at 8:13 pm
lostloveXalexisX GOLD, Neosho, Missouri
16 articles 8 photos 20 comments
this is really good and thanks for checking out my work and commenting on it

KaavyaM SILVER said...
on Apr. 17 2014 at 5:50 am
KaavyaM SILVER, Hyderabad, Other
9 articles 1 photo 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.

This is beautiful. "I find fresh, small, salty marks/ Dancing with your own." This poem is fresh, sad, sweet, wistful and joyful all at once. Keep writing, and you'll go far.

on Apr. 13 2014 at 11:17 am
j.g.poems PLATINUM, Naples, Florida
29 articles 6 photos 43 comments
Wow, thank you so much. That was one of the nicest comments I have ever recieved!

JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 12 2014 at 8:25 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 523 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

You know what I love? When you take something simple (a letter in a mailbox) and turn it into something poetically beautiful, maybe even turn it into a story in itself (a long distance relationship I'm thinking?) This is truly beautiful :) Also, it would flow a lot nicer if you changed your formatting a bit, compact it as Nobuo mentioned. Other than that, oustandingly awesome! :D

Nobuo GOLD said...
on Apr. 12 2014 at 4:38 pm
Nobuo GOLD, Dio, Missouri
16 articles 1 photo 65 comments

Favorite Quote:

Viewtiful, but try compacting it a little bit 

on Apr. 12 2014 at 2:34 pm
j.g.poems PLATINUM, Naples, Florida
29 articles 6 photos 43 comments
thank you!!

on Apr. 12 2014 at 2:33 pm
j.g.poems PLATINUM, Naples, Florida
29 articles 6 photos 43 comments
thanks so so so much!

on Apr. 12 2014 at 1:57 pm
SunnyDreams BRONZE, Niger Falls, Other
1 article 0 photos 274 comments

Favorite Quote:
Can you feel what I have seen, when no one else has lived through what I have?-HalveOfLife


on Apr. 12 2014 at 1:50 pm
SlowEternity BRONZE, Big Lake, Minnesota
4 articles 15 photos 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
Love is like a wildfire; It knows no boundaries.- Em

I love it!t!

on Apr. 12 2014 at 9:18 am
Ray--yo PLATINUM, Kathmandu, Other
43 articles 2 photos 581 comments

Favorite Quote:
God Makes No Mistakes. (Gaga?)
"I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right." -Liesel Meminger via Markus Zusac, "The Book Thief"

I really like some of the structures used, however, I'd prefer the description to be more subtly put. (while you have no obligation to please me, but i had to be honest) Really good work!

on Apr. 12 2014 at 9:12 am
j.g.poems PLATINUM, Naples, Florida
29 articles 6 photos 43 comments
Thanks so much! 

AGDDavy SILVER said...
on Apr. 12 2014 at 9:10 am
AGDDavy SILVER, Tamarac, Florida
9 articles 9 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you believe that your dream already came true, it is easier to achieve it and harder not to make it happen."
-A.G.D. (Me)

It's very simple, succinct and definitely has a voice! (P.S. "Awaiting for my eyes" should be "Awaiting my eyes" or "Awaiting my attention")

on Apr. 12 2014 at 9:08 am
Roy.M.Hunter GOLD, Lamar, South Carolina
18 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"sticks & stones may break my bones, but words can't hurt me."

loved it.