empty evenings | Teen Ink

empty evenings

April 12, 2014
By DelaneyKranz SILVER, Glendale, Arizona
DelaneyKranz SILVER, Glendale, Arizona
9 articles 0 photos 0 comments

oh, food, when did our relationship go so sour
when I was young, I dreamt of bio-engineered trees
with cans of Reddi-Whip blooming from supple branches

the grocery line was a haggle for my mother
begging children all in hope for a candy bar
or a pack of gum
to brighten our simple days

in middle school, I started gaining awkward lumps
and awkward crevices
neither of which I wanted

beforehand I had thought of my body as a frog
smooth skin with a plump stomach and spindly legs
but food, you told me I was beautiful, so I was proud

but we started to grow apart in those later years, food
you became an enemy and I became abusive
when thinning is winning it makes our relationship
a boring cycle of self-imposed warnings and empty evenings

now I try to keep us steady, food
you are not an addiction, I cannot put down the cigarette cold turkey
not with you

when the days get rough I try to become average
you and I screaming at each other in the kitchen, just be normal
peanut butter is spread with a knife
not with a teaspoon

I don’t know where we will go from here, food
you and I have a lot to work out
we have our differences, but the difficult thing is
that there is no one to model off of

my mother abuses you
my brother abuses you
my friends boast of how well they are doing without you

and you and I are here
left in silence as I pluck off the whitest bits of lettuce
and chew our relationship apart


The author's comments:
All of my friends starve themselves.

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