Struggling Artist | Teen Ink

Struggling Artist MAG

October 12, 2014
By haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver


This isn’t what you want.

You force yourself deeper
into this hole
of painted bloody carmines
and deep, commercial,
conventional,
bruising purples and
the black and whites of what love is.

You force yourself into the dead gray
and the chilled ivory of emptiness,
the blackened blue of
idon’tcare
please
letmehave
nothoughts
nothingtodistractme
fromthisnewsong
iwanttohear,
the bitter cranberry of
the inside of casket linings
and the soft, dark brown
of the polished wood outside
of dirt and flowers and grieving air.

You force yourself,
but please,
if you let yourself see
the psychedelic golden colors
of the sunrise blooming on
the mountains,

smiled as tree leaves kissed the wind,
inhaled when autumn breeze blew
burnt orange leaves against your sweater,
exhaled with the energy of conversation
on your tongue, and
laughed at memories of
wild, obnoxious old friends

perhaps you could dig yourself out
and realize you’re painting yourself
an ugly color.
You want this robust,
peaceful flood of calm
lavenders and electric teals.

Create what you deserve.



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This article has 5 comments.


. said...
on Feb. 25 2015 at 9:55 am
Stunning. Magical. Artful - How can I even combine them all in this one piece?!. You see that comments down there, it's unbeliavbly awesome indeed.

on Oct. 15 2014 at 7:00 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

thanks MissEmilyDickinson. What a great penname. She was a great writer. I must say not one of my inspirations, but I still occasionally offer thought to her work and appreciate it nonetheless. 

on Oct. 15 2014 at 6:55 pm
haley101 DIAMOND, Windsor, Connecticut
70 articles 5 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.”

― Mary Oliver

thank you. I felt like painting something. But I'm no good at it so I use words instead. And I thought the whole painting thing was a good way to get my message across - in a way, this is advice to a friend spoken through my own ways of therapies I've found that helped me get myself out of my struggles.   

JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Oct. 15 2014 at 6:35 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 523 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

I can't even words.... this is absolutely amazing and! The picture you painted here is breathtaking and astonishing - and completely relatable:) I truly love this, it's unbelievably awesome 

on Oct. 15 2014 at 12:46 pm
EmilytheBelleofA. DIAMOND, Athens, Georgia
81 articles 5 photos 1486 comments

Favorite Quote:
To love is to be vulnerable; Triumph is born out of struggle; We notice shadows most when they stand alone in the midst of overwhelming light.

I loved this when I saw this before, and I still love it. :) I find it beautiful and wonderful and just amazing. You just put your soul into it. You're a wonderful person and writer, who keeps getting better. You have an amazing talent and greatness and light in you. Congrats on the editor's choice, because you truly deserve it. :) Thank you so much, for sharing this. :)