Dear Depression,

I am sorry,
I am sorry for leaving you
After so long
You made me feel safe
Like you were the only one who would protect me
You made me believe that everyone else was dangerous
And shouldn't be trusted
You made me believe you were the only one there
The only thing that kept me living
You made me believe that without you I was nothing
That without you I should not be living
As everyone started to try and get me to push you away
You made me believe that they were all just trying to kill me
Kill the only thing I had left
I wanted to follow you
Follow you out my bedroom window
While everyone else was asleep
You made me want to die with you
Soon all I could think of was the belt in my closet that grew to small for my waist
But the perfect size for my neck
I needed you
You coated me with your fog
A fog so thick I could no longer see myself without you threw it
I am sorry,
Sorry for letting myself trust you for so long
Letting myself believe the lies you whispered to me
I am sorry for not abandoning you sooner
Leaving you in my dust
I am sorry for taking so long to find myself
I left you behind
Replacing you with the joy I can now feel
The joy I let myself feel
I forced you down
Soon you will see what great accomplishments I can make
See the motivation bubbling up inside me
I want to say thank you
For teaching me how great it is to feel alive
To want to be alive
To realize a world without you
I am sorry
For letting you stick around for so long.

Sincerely,
One of your many survivors