You hated courgettes
So we re-christened them Raw Jets
Because it simplified them
Vegetables became word-play games
Your nose would crumple on sight
And your eyes would slant bitter at the corners
Until your whole face appeared to have been
Knotted up in someone’s fist.
Once
Mum gave us broad bean soup
(we called them bored beans)
Disguised as pea
We decided that we were detectives
And we expelled her and her green potions
So that she would not be the one to slip
The concept of Health
Down our unwilling throats
Years later, you hated food all together
So we re-christened you instead
Called you anorexic
To simplify the math
Of dividing calorie by calorie