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Overwhelming Future
I lie awake
When sleep won't come
And think.
Think about life,
How this essay
And history test
And physics problems
Won't matter a year from now.
When I think about the future
In this way,
It's blissful.
It seems
So simple,
So much happier
And brighter.
The future is unknown, and
As long as it stays distant,
I can pretend
It'll be perfect.
But I'm kidding myself.
For when I think of the pain,
When I remember that
It likely won't leave,
My life
Seems long, and
The future looks bleak.
The future is unknown, and
When I think of it in this way,
That there will be many more
Arguments, more
Stubbed toes and hangnails,
Broken friendships
And betrayal;
More sorrow,
More grief,
More disappointment,
More pain,
It looks no different.
Life seems an endless battle,
Day after day after day
We all fight.
This will never change.
But I think about the good things.
There will be more hugs,
More kisses,
More birthday presents and
Wishes.
More sweet chocolate,
Sipping lemonade in the sun,
And heart-warming books.
More love,
More happiness,
More warmth,
More fun,
More LIFE.
And the future no longer looks bleak;
Life no longer seems too long.
I don't dread what's to come, because
The future is unknown
For a reason.
As I lie awake I think
About what I look forward to,
And smile as I drift to sleep,
And dream about the future.
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I'm so bad at naming poems, just putting that out there! I should just number them instead ;)
Anyway, this poem is pretty self-explanatory; I often get scared thinking about the future, especially since I have a chronic pain and fatigue. The future is so uncertain! But some of the best moments we'll ever experience haven't happened yet; at least we can look forward to that (I think there's some quote about that out there....).