The fresh sting of metal

Could scrape across my skin,

Leaving a swollen, red mark,

And yet I still felt nothing.

Control at it's most vulnerable,

Escaping through the fingers of time,

Begging for another chance,

Yet only causing eternal emptiness.

This seems to bring some relief

As though it were the best,

But I can only guarantee the worst

From a spiraling continuing hell.

Everlasting amounts of warmth,

A comfortable escape from reality,

Yet keeping me from potential,

And discarding all the good things.

Fleeing from depression into apathy,

Forcing my sadness into secrecy,

Envying the opportunities of others,

Yet still remaining inanimate.

Did I ever notice the headaches

Irritating from behind my eyes?

Causing me to ignore my tears

To lead into this life of lies.

I cry out for help to save me,

But I'm not even willing to try.

I'm addicted and want more and more,

But my greed will be my destruction.