It was a hot summer's day and I had just turned three
We had arrived at the store, my mother, my brother, my sister, and me.
It had been over a year since we were struck by tragedy
But that’s a whole ‘nother tale
A whole ‘nother thing
so I’d rather we get This story rolling.

Back at the Walmart

We were there for some mundane reason
Laundry soap, light bulbs, or maybe some sun screen,
But did I care?
No.
I was Alice who had discovered Wonderland.
And Maybe you laugh
But hey back then,
There was a McDonald's in the front entrance about two feet down
With toys, video games, and a creepy af clown.
Although i wasn’t interested
My brother sure was
He walked straight in
Picked up a gaming controller and pressed begin.

My mom turned her head,

Maybe to say stop or tell him to wait
But that was her fatal and final mistake.
Because I was a whole three years old
With legs I had finally figured out
And the second her stare lost its hold
I was gone.

Off like a shot

Heart racing
Blood pumping
My feet pounding on the laminated flooring.

But don’t put the blame on my mother
She was new to being a single mom
And three kids are hard enough for two let alone one.
Also, have you met me?
I did not make it easy.

Her gaze was gone for a second maybe two but it was enough for me to disappear from view.
I ran through shelves stacked full of items whose function was a mystery until i reached…
The women’s section.
Why you may ask?
Because this aisle contained the most beautiful most perfect
Hide and Go Seek spot.
Oh didn’t I tell you?
This is a game we’re all playing
That’s it,
No hidden agenda, anger or suppressed resentment
This is just about fun
And with a three year old on the run
Loose in a store
With nooks and crannies and hiding places galore
You probably would have done
The same thing my mom did when she realized she was down one.

While I was just playing a game
The fear in my mom spiked
Because with my changing hair color
She couldn’t even tell the guard what her daughter looked liked.
So there I was.
Hiding in my jean covered security blanket,
When I heard a booming voice over head
Scared at the noise my heart filled with fear and dread.

“Attention Walmart Shoppers we are in lock down mode. I repeat lock down mode. Thank you.”

The front doors close and are bolted shut
And suddenly,
This isn’t fun anymore.
Because while I love hide and go seek
My energy levels were at their peak.
I needed to move.
Where did I go?

The book aisle of course
Because even as a toddler I was still a massive dork.

That’s where they found me
Surrounded by a sea
of colorful books
And my mom was probably mad, but remarkably her anger wasn’t a buzz
But hey when you’re young and as cute as I was
You can get away with anything,

And you probably think that’s it
The curtain has fallen and my stories are done
But you don’t know how wrong
You are.

A moment of silence please, for my mom’s sanity
Which is about to take a nosedive.
Flash forward to Disneyland, California
2005.