Through That Doorway | Teen Ink

Through That Doorway

April 4, 2013
By swat17 SILVER, Mineral, Virginia
swat17 SILVER, Mineral, Virginia
6 articles 0 photos 34 comments

Through that doorway lays a land full of peace,
people full of hate,
and hearts full of love.
Turn the doorknob and see the fires cease,
officials in debate,
wealth and power rise above.
What lays beyond the door-frame is but a bipolar mess,
an indecisive crowd,
lazy and crazy "countrymen".
Step out and let your mind know of our worthlessness,
see the shrouds,
think of how long this has been.

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This article has 4 comments.

on Apr. 17 2013 at 8:58 pm
Fallen_ PLATINUM, Quakertown, Pennsylvania
25 articles 3 photos 433 comments

Favorite Quote:
" a shattered world is only an opening into a new beginning with laughs, smiles, and love all around enter the world of the light and away from the broken darkness"

short, sweet , extremly deep i like your flow and you meaning behind very deep though whichi loved

Mckay ELITE said...
on Apr. 17 2013 at 2:55 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2230 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

This is very deep. I love how you can convey deep emotions with your poetry. 

on Apr. 15 2013 at 7:07 pm
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I'd rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I'd rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear.” -Edgar Guest

Holy shoot, a real good one! I like this, i like the tone and the way it makes you think. I paused in the beginning when i got to "people full of hate,/ and hearts full ove love." As i am sure you wanted me to. I was so used to thinking of doors into wonderlands and Narnian wardrobes that I had tostart over before continuing. This is a door to the real world, and perhaps that is a little more valable, at least in some ways. Your rhymes were clever, the idea behind int all almost wildly simple, but someone I love it. One tiny piece of advice? "Is but a bipolar mess" sounded odd, made sense! But still, the beginning, "Is but a" sounded like filler. Maybe an adjetive? "What lays beyond the doorframe is/ a [mad] bipolar mess..." or something like that. Dont kbow. Its super good anyway, and i still wanna give it a 5/5

on Apr. 14 2013 at 4:30 pm
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hi! I love how in this poem you say things without really saying things! There was a sense of mystery and open perspective because you let the reader take what they want from this and try to decipher what it was about to not only you, but to the reader. The word choices are wonderful! The rhythm is also wonderful! Amazing, amazing job!