Not Knowing | Teen Ink

Not Knowing

March 3, 2012
By Live.Laugh.Love-Life BRONZE, Stockbridge, Georgia
Live.Laugh.Love-Life BRONZE, Stockbridge, Georgia
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.&quot; Edgar Allan Poe<br /> <br /> &quot;I&#039;m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can&#039;t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don&#039;t deserve me at my best.&rdquo;<br /> ― Marilyn Monroe


I was tired tired of the lies, tired of the guilt, I was tired from the pain and hurt I had gone through for years; not knowing things was the only answer I could give to people. It was three years ago that I had seen him that he was here with me. It had all happened so fast, in a flash he was gone I didn’t know what the saying meant “You never really know how much you love something until it’s gone," until that day I had everything why did everything seem to happen on that day.

Past: June 14, 2008
It was like any normal day in WestPoint, Arizona you would see kids outside skate boarding, playing tag, walking their dogs, you might even see some kids doing chores but it was the happiness that got to me the most. I lived here since I was two with my dad and step mom my biological mom was a drug addict so we left her three years later she decided she would go to rehab I visited her occasionally but not often. I left school that day wondering how and when did my life turn into some teenage drama story that aired on ABC. I thought to myself, looking back was the hardest thing to do right now but trying to forget was like asking a person to jump off cliff, yes they would do it if you reassured it was safe, but it would always come back to haunt you knowing you took someone’s life.

When I visited the rehab center where my mom was at we talked for a while.
“Look Aubrey I don’t want you getting hurt," She said to me almost concerned.
“Mom I’m not going to get hurt this is a safe place for me, Ok! Why did you even come here,” I asked trying not to sound hurt even though my face and expressions were telling a whole different story.
“Aubrey in two days two horrific events will happen to you and with each one someone must die,” and with that she left I was left sitting at a table all by myself wondering what in the world she meant I tried yelling for her to come back and talk to me explain what she was trying to tell me. Aubrey in two days two horrific events- I stopped there analyzing every word two days will be my birthday is was born on June 16, 1995 it was a Friday in mid morning in Oregon.

I left hoping maybe she was wrong… My name is Aubrey and this is my story..


The author's comments:
I was left out about things and then something happened... I didn't know about it for a real long time but I soon realized what it was.

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