When I wake up dreaming to die I want to see your face and know I made it home, so then I can once again start wishing for life. Since our lives have crossed, mine has seemed to shine with the quality of a diamond in the rough. But when you told me that you loved me my life glistened even brighter than before. Slowly as life with you progressed I seemed to gleam more and more. I smiled more, and I laughed more. Even better than just laughing, you laughed with me.
You wanted me not for what couldd give you but what you could offer to me. It’s ridiculous how easy it was for me to let my hair down around you. I was usually always so deeply guarded that at times coulddn’t even tell people what I was thinking. I hid myself from everyone including myself. Although somewhere along the road you tore down the barricade and exposed me. I wasn’t scared or terrified I was relieved and happy. Happy to finally be free of the fear that kept me rooted in one spot and prevented my life from growing.
I was, and still am, incredulous at the thought that you my love have found a way past the ice of my heart and into the warmth that was waiting to reveal itself. From deep within me you pulled out the hurt, the sadness, the betrayal, and the gut wrenching disappointments. You banished them from me and told them that I didn’t deserve them. You made them pack up and go so that finally my heart could comfortably warm my body back to life. Without struggling to pump enough love through me because of the strange icicles that dangled so pretty across it for so long.
What did you do to me? How did you get me to love life? When did this even begin to happen? Who did I see when I saw you? Where did your hands begin to explore me and start bringing me back to life? Why did you even care? As far as I was concerned I was just someone to be used and put back for the next customer. I was just another passing phase. I was the code that couldn’t be cracked, the one that draws in the attention of a passing ephemeral suitor who wanted a little fun. But you saw past that.
Did you see it in the beginning? Or did I let my guard fall and speak to you through my dreams as I lay sleeping beside you? I just can’t figure it out. Somewhere along the lines of our lives crossing our roles have switched. From me being the secret to you becoming the enticing mystery. Now the flavor of your mystery dances across my tongue. Tingling my imagination and tickling it with glee. I am so happy and excited that I get to live my life with you. I am so happy and excited that I get to be your wife too.