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The Color Of The Inside Of My Mouth MAG

January 22, 2009
By Bassoonkelley GOLD, Tampa, Florida
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Bassoonkelley GOLD, Tampa, Florida
15 articles 0 photos 49 comments
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I wipe at my stupid eyes with the back of my hand, and it startles me for a second that my tears are gray. I dunno why it surprised me; I mean, I buy the s***ty mascara that’s $1.99 in the 20 Items or Less checkout lane. Why spend oodles of green on something I hardly ever use?

I just wanted to look nice, you know? Like those girls who’re just naturally fake pretty. The girls who can blend shades of eyeshadow like no one’s business, and match their lipstick to the exact color of their toenail polish or whatever. Seemingly effortless, yet impeccably coordinated.

This is good stuff, I should write for a living – solely on the subject of beauty queens with superiority complexes, of course.

I just want … God, what do I want? I want to feel the sun on my face and paint the clouds and hear the music in the trees and love myself and love someone else and just feel perpetually beautiful.

But that requires the $14.99 waterproof, fire-retardant, Grade-5-hurricane-resistant mascara, not the tube that’s two bucks in Lane 4.

My shoes are dirty and outdated, but that’s how I like them. I like these shoes. They’re comfortable. Why do I need new, expensive, fashionably appealing shoes in order for someone to say, “Hey dogg, you look nice today”?

And why is it that whenever I get deathly bored and slather cheap, pore-clogging makeup all over my face everyone suddenly says, “Wow, you look pretty!”? Since when is “pretty” about whale blubber and cocoa butter?

I’ll tell you one thing, though. I most definitely am not crying about some stupid XY.

Definitely not.

I’m crying for all the whales that have to give up their fatty insulation so that some fugly anorexic super bitch can paint herself pretty every freaking day, giving him something halfway decent to oggle all the time.

Seriously, I’m not leaking saltwater over a guy.

I just think it’s cruel and unfair that the fat-endowed marine life population doesn’t even get the slightest warning that they’ll soon be on a cosmetics endcap at K-Mart.

He could have at least broken it to me gently, you know? We’ve been friends since the George Bush/Al Gore debacle.

I mean come the Bette Midler on.

I spill my blood, guts, and viscera out to this guy and he throws down the “Let’s just be friends” card without a second thought?

It’s just … it’s common courtesy to ease someone into heartbreak, not smash it over their head like a whiffleball bat.

You know what? I’m going to take my $1.99 checkout Lane 4 mascara and chuck it right at her big, stupid square head.

© Anna H., Buckeye, AZ

The author's comments:
This is literally an excerpt from my journal, so it's a little different when it comes to writing style.
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This article has 476 comments.

Def_Leppard_fan120 SILVER said...
on Jan. 7 2012 at 1:11 am
Def_Leppard_fan120 SILVER, Lake Lorane, Florida
5 articles 0 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you want your dreams to come true, Make them come true. If you want to win, Make it a win. <br /> The only one that is stopping you from accomplish your dreams is YOU.

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Come check out my article called THE BATTLE and comment on what you thought about it.
duckypoodle said...
on Jan. 3 2012 at 4:33 pm
The one guy I ever poured myself out too was actually understanding. That gives me confidence, because after reading everything that other girls go through, I was scared to tell him. But, you know, you just gotta go through with it, because even though this guy didn't like me, he still hung out with me and joked. And makeup is seriously for people who need confidence. Those who have confidence don't need makeup.
BlueRain BRONZE said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 6:16 pm
BlueRain BRONZE, Clarkston, Michigan
2 articles 5 photos 254 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.&quot;

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The sad part is is that when they say "Let's be friends", that really means "Okay, I know you, but it's too weird to talk anymore because.. well... yeah, so let's go be on separate universes and then be all surprised when I realize halfway through the school year that you share a class or two with me."

Well, that's what they're usually thinking. But with less courtesy.

Loftus GOLD said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 4:11 pm
Loftus GOLD, Ocoee, Florida
11 articles 1 photo 88 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You&#039;re on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the one who&#039;ll decide where you&#039;ll go.&quot; -Dr. Seuss

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This is pretty good. I really enjoyed this. I also love the title. Keep adding stuff from your journal! 
NicoleAnn BRONZE said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 3:22 pm
NicoleAnn BRONZE, St Helens, Oregon
1 article 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be The Change You Wish To See In The World!(: ~ Gandhi<br /> Don&#039;t Hate The Player Hate The Game!(: ~ Anonoyms

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Wow This Is Really Good I Think You Should Make This Into A Series Or Something Like That Or Maybe Try To Publish It I Seriouslly Would Buy This If You Made It Into A Book Or Series :)
nolanje80 PLATINUM said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 1:58 pm
nolanje80 PLATINUM, Kalispell, Montana
30 articles 19 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;When you&#039;re dreaming with a broken heart <br /> The waking up is the hardest part <br /> You roll outta bed and down on your knees <br /> And for a moment you can hardly breathe&rdquo; <br /> ― John Mayer

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i agree with blueeyedgirl18. this also sounds like my journal. and i get where you are coming from ont he fact that soo many guys play the "i just want to be friends" card even aftr you tell him all your idrty little secrets. how is that at all fair?
Blueeyedgirl18 GOLD said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 12:32 pm
Blueeyedgirl18 GOLD, Kulpmont, Pennsylvania
10 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life happens while you&#039;re busy making plans.

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This sounds like my diary:) lol I love it:)
MarissaWhitecloud SILVER said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 11:04 am
MarissaWhitecloud SILVER, Oskaloosa, Iowa
7 articles 0 photos 84 comments
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A little mean but I loved it. You're really good at writing.
Adnama BRONZE said...
on Dec. 16 2011 at 9:50 am
Adnama BRONZE, Sidney, Iowa
4 articles 0 photos 9 comments
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I really love this because it is true about a whole bunch of people including myself.  This just comes out and speaks the truth.
FatesMistake13 said...
on Nov. 27 2011 at 9:31 pm
FatesMistake13, Springerville, Arizona
0 articles 0 photos 157 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are one&#039;s mistakes.&quot; Oscar Wilde <br /> <br /> &quot;The books that the world calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame.&quot;

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ahhh love it!
mylifestoryonmywrist BRONZE said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 8:32 pm
mylifestoryonmywrist BRONZE, West Monroe, Louisiana
2 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;So I walked back to my room and collapsed on the bottom bunk, thinking that if people were rain, I was drizzle and she was a hurricane.&rdquo; <br /> ― John Green, Looking for Alaska

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I laughed at the part where you said, like the girls who are naturally fake pretty. 
Dino-chan BRONZE said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 6:20 pm
Dino-chan BRONZE, Wentzville, Missouri
1 article 2 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;death cannot stop true love only delay it for a while&quot; westly the princess bride

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it seemed incompleat for some reason
harrypotter143 said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 3:14 pm
harrypotter143, Uxbridge, Other
0 articles 2 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
Since everybody is an individual, nobody can be you. You are unique. No one can tell you how to use your time. It is yours. Your life is your own. You mold it. You make it. <br /> <br /> ~ Eleanor Roosevelt &hearts;*

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wow. i mean, really, wow. (:

 

fantastic story!! it totally got to me ! you just explained my life :$

XxkierstanxX BRONZE said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 11:42 am
XxkierstanxX BRONZE, Douglassville, Pennsylvania
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
i have lots but my favorites are by me <br /> <br /> Hate may be a strong word but LOVE is even stronger<br /> i have more bu i dnt remember them xD there was like twoo more

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agreed great story haha
prettylittlewriter BRONZE said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 10:47 am
prettylittlewriter BRONZE, Villa Park, California
2 articles 0 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
These violent delights have violent ends.

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Wow, this is very heartfelt and very good writing
starlightstarbright PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 10:20 am
starlightstarbright PLATINUM, Hoffman Estates, Illinois
25 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Some of you may have taken history or civics classes that outlined the freedoms one expects in a democracy. At the heart of those freedoms is choice... With an affirmative choice, all democracy vanishes.&quot;

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I apologize. In the first line, that was supposed to be "itself", not "it said."
starlightstarbright PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 10:17 am
starlightstarbright PLATINUM, Hoffman Estates, Illinois
25 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Some of you may have taken history or civics classes that outlined the freedoms one expects in a democracy. At the heart of those freedoms is choice... With an affirmative choice, all democracy vanishes.&quot;

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"Fear of a word increases fear of the thing it said." -Albus Dumbledore, correct me if I'm wrong. Her "explicit wording" gives strength to her language, raw emotion to her story. If you read her little info post, this is an excerpt from her journal. Why would she moderate her language in a jornal? If you wish to read something without swears, don't even bother touching classic literature. A writer needs passion, and the words - ALL words- supply it to her.
jobros4eva said...
on Nov. 24 2011 at 9:55 am

PLEASE DON'T READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST FRIDAY BY THE ONE YOU LOVE. NOW YOU'VE STARTED READING THIS SO DON'T STOP.

THIS IS REALLY FREAKY!!!

1)say your name 10 times

2)say your mom's name 5 times

3)say your crush's name 3 times

4)paste this on 4 other posts. if you do this your crush will kiss you on the nearest friday. if you don't do this after reading this you will get bad luck

send this to 4 other post in 143 minutes when done press F6 and the name of your crush will appear on the screen in big letters

Tcoolgirl BRONZE said...
on Nov. 2 2011 at 4:45 pm
Tcoolgirl BRONZE, San Tan Valley, Arizona
3 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch you words, they become actions. Watch your actions, they become you. Watch yourself, you affect others.&quot;

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It's good! :)
Malloy213 said...
on Nov. 2 2011 at 2:01 pm
Malloy213, Meowmix, Iowa
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Try not to become a man of success but a man of value.<br /> ~Albert Einstein

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All I can say is that this story is amazing