Another day, another traumatic lunchroom scene. This time they were throwing pizza, could be worse. Grayson just lets his friends do it, he doesn’t stick up for me or tell them to stop. He just watches along with the other students that are too afraid to chime in, in fear of being the next one getting bullied.

When will they realize, we are the same? They scream at me and call me names. Ugly. Stupid. I take it, I have no reason to stick up for myself, if I do, the bullying will get worse, right? Meanwhile, my brother is being praised for his good looks and athleticism. Sometimes I even wonder if they know that we are brothers. It always used to be Conan and Grayson. Now it just seems like Grayson and some other kid that he used to be best friends with. Now all he cares about is being the most popular, and I am just the kid that helps him to get there by taking the bullying to make him look cool. But it's not cool. Doesn’t he know that he hurts me? His friends say the mean words and he is the bystander. I wish he would do something about it.

“I’m sorry.”

“If you were really sorry you would have stuck up for me.”

I stood staring at myself in the bathroom mirror. I have red sauce splattered all over me. I could see an empathetic look on Grayson’s face as he loomed behind me.

“I have an extra shirt in my locker you can borrow. I’m ditching class and going to Peyton’s. Text me if you want my combination,”

Peyton is Grayson’s girlfriend. She lives across town and goes to North High. Grayson’s attendance record is suffering from all of his lunchtime visits, but he doesn’t care because he would do anything for Peyton. I wish someone cared that much about me.

42-0-12. Grayson’s locker combination lights up on my phone. I push through the hallway, seeming more like a jungle than anything, teenagers acting as monkeys rather than students. I make my way to his locker and retrieve the shirt. It is definitely Grayson’s. It is a grey long sleeve shirt with white writing down the sleeves, definitely something I am too ‘nerdy’ for. I go to the bathroom and put it on. Looking in the mirror I no longer see myself. My glasses have broken after someone stepped on them in lunch, so I am no longer wearing them, I look totally different. Confident, maybe.

The final bell rings. A few people high five me as I walk down the hall. People I have never seen in my life. Wait no, I do recognize these people, they are all my brother’s friends, my bullies. Maybe Grayson had told them I was cool and to stop being mean to me. Maybe Grayson actually realized how he is in the wrong. Either way, I’ll take the high fives if it means no more bullying. I walk out to the busses and notice a white jeep with the top off, piled with the popular kids.

“Gray!” They all start shouting looking my way. They must be referring to my grey shirt. I run over to the car.

“Don't just stand there, get in!”

“Me?” I ask, confused.

“Who else?!” They all look at each other.

Ok, what is going on.

I sit down on my bed and take out my phone. No new texts. No one apologizing for the endless years of bullying. No explanation as to why all of a sudden everyone is acting like we’re best friends. But honestly, I don't want to know. Whatever my brother did to make them stop, it worked. I am no longer the loser.

“Can we go to the mall, please?” I beg my mother hoping she will say yes.

“What for? Your clothes are fine.” I knew she would say that.

“My glasses broke today I need new ones”

“Well honey, you have that other pair, just wear those” She seemed determined to stay home. But I am even more determined to finally look like less of a ‘nerd’, and get contacts.

“I was hoping I could maybe get contacts,” my voice was trembling.

“Fine, get in the car.” Yes, I won the debate. As we stroll past the store windows, I convince my mom to let me inside and get a new article of clothing. The assorted bags start to pile up. All while we were shopping I told myself to think like Grayson, what does he wear that makes him look so cool?

“Where is he?!” My mom is screaming downstairs. It is too early for this, I think to myself. Then I realize, he never came home last night. This is the first time he hasn’t been home before school starts the next day. Usually, he sneaks through his window before 2 am. I knew he would be fine, he always is. I had greater things on my mind than to worry about Grayson’s whereabouts. Today is the first day of the new me. New contacts, new clothes, new confidence. I look at my phone seeing a text from Grayson confirming he slept over at a friends house. Sitting down at the kitchen table I can tell my parents are wondering why the sudden change of my appearance. But I don’t care. This is the new me, and they will just have to accept that.

Lunch. Always the worst time of day. My morning classes went by in a breeze, no one called me names or attempted a punch. It is different, and I like it. But now as I walk into the lunchroom and I debate where to sit, I go back to my old habits and find myself slouched in a seat at the empty lunch table. Then I see them, the kids that were being so nice to me yesterday with no context given, and my brother. Strutting into the lunchroom. I hear them mumbling something about yesterday, talking about giving him a ride, then both Grayson and I come to a realization, they mistook me for him. I prepare myself for the worst, and let me tell you, I am glad I prepared. They all storm over, yelling and shouting, some words I can't even comprehend, I hear them shout ‘fake’ and ‘poser’. Here I was thinking the bullying would go away, but I just made it worse for myself, I should have realized that they would never be nice to me. When they finally reach my table they stand and stare, as if aware that I have a new level of confidence. I seem so much like Grayson.

“Hey, you!’ The boys shouted in unison, ”Yesterday we thought you were Grayson!”

“Ya! We gave you a ride and everything! We wouldn't have given you one if we knew it was you! You tricked us and now you’re going to pay!”

I brace myself, I felt his fist hover over my face, in slow motion almost.

“HEY!”

We all turn around to see Grayson with a red face and his hands in fists.

“Leave Conan alone, he didn't even do anything!” Wow. My brother is finally sticking up for me. After the years of saying sorry he is finally putting an end to it.

“Why do you guys bully him? You say he is ugly but me, on the other hand, you praise my good looks. Well, guess what? You guys have been so focused on making fun of Conan, calling him ugly for absolutely no reason that you have a fake image of him in your minds that aren't him, and for me I am labeled gorgeous and everyone says how attractive I am because you know me well as a person and you know how I am on the inside. Yesterday when you mistook Conan for me, don't you think you would have been able to tell us apart if we looked as different as you describe us as? Apparently not. Because we are identical twins.”

They stood and stared in awe. Surrounded by the crowd of students they finally realize. We look the exact same.