I have finally started my new life in New York City, my absolute dream. I open up the door to leave my new apartment, and I step out onto the busy New York street, when all my troubles in the past fly off my shoulders, just as my scarf gets caught in the wind. The sun is starting to shine on my pale face and the wind is blowing through my long, brown wavy hair.

As I stride to my new job as an assistant at a highly praised retail store, Versace, I can’t help but think how far I have come; with a mother who was more interested in alcohol than she was with my life. It makes me so glad I left my mom; she could have easily ruined my life, because she was too consumed in her own.

I escaped to New York to hide from all my problems back in Utah. New York City was always my goal, a way to distract me from my problems. In my eyes, it was the best place to go. I heard the city was always alive and busy. It really is so vibrant, I have so many places to go to! Everywhere I turn there is something to do, something to see, and somewhere to be. As I walked down the packed sidewalk, my stride becomes more confident, ready to take on my dream life. I near my new job’s headquarters and take in a breath of the city air, remembering the day I told my mom that I was moving away; the second best day in my life because this was not only the day I was starting to embark on my dream but it was also the day I was leaving my past behind me.

***

“Why do you have to leave me,” she slurred, “I never meant to hurt you. You are my main priority, nothing else can stop me from loving you.” But it was too late, nothing could stop me from escaping my fears and starting my dream life in New York City.

“It’s too late Mom. I’ve already made up my mind and you can’t take back what you’ve already done.” I quickly packed my bags and ran out the door, tears filling my eyes. I had to get away, my mom’s drinking was unbearable. It was almost as if I was living with a college student, she was too consumed with partying, drinking, and boys that she didn’t have enough time to focus on me. Even when I was telling her that I was going to be leaving her, she was too drunk to remember what I told her, but she would care enough to be worried for where I went. I knew when she would find out I moved to New York City, she would just drink some more to cope with her sadness. What she would never realize is that she had abandoned me ever since I was twelve.

My parents had me when they were young. My mom was still in college, which throughout my early childhood really showed. When I was about five years old, I mostly remember being with my dad. My mom was off going to parties with her friends, just like a college student would do. But at about seven years old, that changed. My mom began to take parenting more seriously. She started being a part of my life and began to become my best friend. She was doing everything right. I finally had a normal family. She was the soccer mom of my small town in Utah: she went to every parent meeting, every soccer game, and fashion competition I participated in, she was my biggest fan. My mom was my role model, she was so understanding, strong, she would love you unconditionally to the point where I would feel so smothered and you’d want to push her away. In fact, I did.

But that didn’t last long. In fact, this lasted only five years that I had finally felt normal and not embarrassed by my family. Then it all changed once my mom found out my dad was leaving her to be with another woman. Hearing this was just as much of a shock towards me as it was for my mom. My dad was my knight in shining armour. He was always there for me, to take care of me, and now all of a sudden he wanted nothing to do with me. I was just as worthless as my mom, and he thought I would just keep holding him back. This broke my mom and I, but instead of trying to get through this heartbreak together, she pushed me away.

My mom was never the same after. She went back to her old way of coping, drinking, and in my opinion the absolute worst decision she could have ever made. I now dream about those days. I can’t ever see my mom being like that again. I knew the “normal” days were gone for good. This is why I had to leave, it became too much to bare.

***

As soon as I enter the building my boss quickly leads the way. The place was bustling with business calls, cloth being cut, and designs being scribbled onto papers. It was nothing I had ever seen before, and I knew that I was just shy of already being in love with this newfound lifestyle. My boss pulls me to a new desk and slams down a stack of new designs, telling me to sort them by styles, as a welcoming to the new job. But I couldn’t complain, because just as I’d hoped, my mind was already traveling a mile a minute, further and further from my mom and my past.

Once I finished sorting through the oddly large stacks of designs, I decide to roam around the place and get a feel for the environment and people I would be seeing each day. Walking around I couldn't help but smile to myself, and see how far I had already come. At the end of the day, I pack up all my things and head out the door, my first day was complete. The sky is now dark and the air is frigid. Luckily, since I grew up in Utah I was used to the cold. I see a taxi coming up, so I wave the driver down. The taxi pulls up to a stop and I hop in. I’m eager to get home, take off my heels, and lay down in my bed with a nice cup of hot tea. The taxi ride feels like forever even though it was just two blocks down. As I exit the taxi, I see a female figure standing right by the door to my apartment.

“Would you mind waiting for me until I reach my apartment?” I ask the taxi driver, he nods his head and I scooch out, as I inched closer I realized it was no one I should be worried about, it was just a drunk homeless woman, someone who seems all too familiar even though she was a complete stranger. I see this homeless woman and it brings me back to my mom, instead of being afraid and running away, I start walking towards her and my apartment, my fears can’t stop me, I’m home now. My dream wasn’t going to be persuaded by my mom anymore. I am on my own and my mom will never stop me from reaching other goals again. I turn around and give the taxi driver a big smile and wave. As I enter my home I release a sigh of relief. My new life that I have made for myself is nothing but a dream. I know that the worst of my life is now in the past, my mom can never hold me back again, no one can.