It’s very dark. I can’t see anything. I feel fuzzy and floaty. Things are peaceful. Cutting through the peace is a loud and incessant beeping noise. Can someone turn the volume down? My eyelids feel really light. I should probably open them.

My eyes flutter open. A white ceiling stares back. Along with 3 figures. 2 are sitting by my bed, er, the thing I’m lying on. I get the strange feeling it’s not my bed. The last figure is standing. Of the 3 figures, the first to notice my newfound wakefulness is an older woman. She’s got burgundy hair, tan skin, and dark eyes. She looks as if she’s been crying. Next to her is a young lady, who can’t be older than 20, with similar hair to the lady, fair skin and lighter eyes. The last figure is a man, he’s wearing clothes that cover most of him, is he a doctor?

“Anne? Anne, honey, are you awake?” The older woman asks. Who’s Anne? She’s looking at me, am I Anne? Who are these people? This gets the attention of the other two who’s heads snap to look at me. I slowly sit up.

“Anne! You’re okay! We were so worried when we heard about the accident!” The other girl says. Accident? What accident? What is going on?

The man finally speaks up. “Anne Simmons? You’re in the hospital, you got severely injured in a car accident earlier, do you remember?” The hospital? I try to remember what happened, it’s dark. I can’t recall anything.

I open my mouth to ask them my questions. Before anything can come out, I start to cough. The older woman places a hand on my shoulder and the younger gets me a glass of water. After my coughing fit ends, I take the glass and gulp the water down. They all watch me patiently, no doubt waiting to see what I have to say.

I take a breath. “Who’s Anne?” The ladies share a glance. Am I supposed to know who that is? Is she important?

The older lady gives a nervous chuckle. “Anne, honey, now’s not the time to make jokes like that.” I tilt my head. Did she think it was a joke? I watch the expression on both ladies' faces go from relieved to world-shattered.

“I was afraid this might happen…” The doctor? sighed. “Would you 2 please follow me for a minute?” He asks, referring to the two ladies. They nod and follow him out. I take this chance to look around the room. The smell of sanitizing solutions stings my nose. The room is covered in blue and white with the occasional wood surface poking out. The incessant beeping noise appears to be coming from one of the machines next to my bed that’s hooked up to me. There are a few pretty yellow flowers next to the bed on a small nightstand in a clear vase. The room feels a bit unnerving honestly. I reach towards the flower and touch the petals. After turning my head, I see my hair and notice it is very similar to the ladies.

The ladies come back and immediately the older woman hugs me. “Oh my baby, please tell me it isn’t true! Anne, you remember me, right?” She cups my face in her hands. I stare at her blankly. Should I? Why does everyone keep calling me Anne? That was probably my name. She obviously seems to know me. I… can’t recall who she is supposed to be. The tears that threatened to drop finally start to fall as she realizes I didn’t know who she was. She hugs me once more, tighter this time.

“Anne…” the other girl starts but stops herself from saying anything else. She gives me a soft, somber smile as if accepting I probably wouldn’t remember her. “I’m Katherine, your little sister… you liked to call me Rin, told me ‘Kat is too basic for you.’ That’s mom. We were so worried when we heard what happened. Well, not that you can remember anyways…” She trails off as if thinking about what she should say.

Everything feels so familiar. Why can’t I just remember?! This shouldn’t be that hard! Anne Simmons… Katherine, er, Rin Simmons… mom… they feel so familiar and yet so foreign… I frown, lost in thought.

— <> — <> — <> —

Rin didn’t know what to do. What to think, even. Anne, her sister whom she looked up to all her life, no matter how often they squabbled, sitting there with no recollection of her or mom. ‘Amnesia’ The doctor had said. There’s no telling how much she remembers, or if she remembers anything at all. Rin knows it’s not Anne’s fault she can’t remember; Rin knows it’s not the fault of the other driver who died on the way to the hospital, either. Rin’s trying to keep up a brave face, more for her mom’s sake than hers she tells herself. The truth though, is Rin was scared. The Anne who took care of her when she was ill, the Anne who would always argue with her about whose turn it was with the remote, the Anne who held her as she cried the night her first girlfriend broke up with her, was gone, replaced with a familiar stranger who had no idea of the family she had lost.

Rin stared at the face of Anne who was surely lost in her thoughts by now. Even without her memories, Anne’s face scrunched up the same way, with that certain look in her eyes. It was almost enough to make Rin smile for real. Almost. The doctor, who was standing off to the side, cleared his throat, bringing everyone’s attention to him.

“I don’t mean to interject, but I feel as if we should do a few tests to see how much she remembers now and if she’ll ever be able to remember anything she has lost in the future.”

“Alright, sounds—” their mom sniffled, “ sounds good.” Rin couldn’t help but frown as she stared at her mom. The whole situation, while it had hit her hard, it had hit their mom worse. Anne went with the doctor and Rin sat down next to her mom. Once she had sat down, her mother latched onto Rin and started sobbing. Her mom had lost her baby, and yet she was still right there.

— <> — <> — <> —

The doctor pulled me into a room. I was asked a bunch of questions I had no idea what the answers were, as well as many I did know the answers to. I was then pulled into another room for another test. This one took ages. I was grateful that it ended when it did and I could return to the room with the ladies.

Upon returning, Rin noticed me first and got herself out of the grip that her… our mother had put her in. The doctor once more pulled them out of the room to chat. I once more patiently wait, staring at the flowers. Did I like flowers? They’re so pretty, how could I not? I smile, thinking I may have finally remembered something. This chat lasted longer than last time. I spent the time staring at the flowers.

They returned and noticed me staring at the flowers. “Oh, right, sorry, I know you don’t like flowers because your boyfriend would give them to you after every time he cheated, but—” Rin started. Oh. I didn’t like flowers? My expression must have said something because Rin’s frown deepened. “You didn’t remember you didn’t like flowers, did you? Well, that’s good because that means you don’t remember Alan then.” Rin’s smile returned. It’s the same smile she gave me when she was introducing herself and mother.

“I’m sorry…” I say. I bet Anne was a nice girl. I bet she loved Rin. I can’t be the Anne that Rin knew. It left a pit in my stomach to think that, but it is the truth. Rin walked over to me and gave me a hug.

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault.” Rin said. It’s not my fault, but it is. I stole Anne from you.

— <> — <> — <> —

After a while, I was discharged from the hospital. I was brought to a nice house, 2 floors, white outside, grey roof. There are some concrete steps to get up to the stained oak door. Upon entering the house, there’s a wave of familiarity. I’ve been here before. I could tell as I walked through the entryway towards the living room. It’s a plain room with family pictures along the walls and on shelves. There’s a couch wedged in one corner and a chair in another corner along the same wall. There’s a TV along the wall across from the seating. The place feels super cozy. Super familiar. I turn away from the living room and towards the stairs. I slowly amble up them and an even stronger wave of familiarity hits.

I walk through the hallway until I reach a plain door with a simple black sign with white letters and border on it, ‘Anne’s Room’. My room. Without even seeing the sign, it’s as if I already knew this was mine. I open the door after a moment of hesitation. The room is simple like the rest of the house has been so far. Pale purple walls, a small bed in the corner, a few posters, and a bunch of other assorted things. Nothing brings back any memories of me even being in this room though. 

The main thing that catches my attention, was the instrument hung in the corner by the foot of the bed. I walk over towards it and run my fingers over the strings. As I do each one lets out a soft note. It’s out of tune, it hasn’t been played in a while. How do I know it’s out of tune? Is this my instrument? I tentatively pick it up and something about the feel of the instrument in my hands feels so right. Like I could curl up for hours just plucking the strings or gliding the bow across them.

“I see you’ve found your violin.” A voice says. I turn towards the door and see Rin standing in the doorway. “You used to practice it all the time. Even at the dinner table until mom finally told you to stop.” She gives a light chuckle. She’s smiling, but I can see in her eyes that she’s not actually happy. Why would she be? You can’t remember who you are even supposed to be. You’re not her Anne.

“Can… Can you help me tune it?” It felt awkward asking Rin to help me tune it. I need to know though. It feels so important, is there a reason for that?

Rin’s smile grew a little and felt less sad. She nodded and walked over to me. She held out a hand for the instrument and I gave it to her. She grabbed the bow and tightened it before gliding it over the strings. With each string she tuned, a strange feeling washed over me.

— <> — <> — <> —

School finally ended. I get off the bus and run inside. Mom’s in the kitchen, as she usually is when I get home. She gives me a smile and says something about putting my stuff in my room. I agree and run upstairs. I set my backpack down and walked over to the corner where the violin sat. I smile as I grab the bow and tighten the hair. I grab my rosin and scrape it across the bow. I then place the instrument on my shoulder, it fitting perfectly in the crook of my neck. I tune it, the notes becoming perfect ripples in a lake.

My eyes close as I start to play some scales, listening closely to the sound of each note. I open them as I finish and move on to practicing a piece I’ve been working on for a while. I get halfway through the piece when a younger Rin comes knocking. She walks in and sits on my bed, watching me play. I ask her what she wants, and she tells me mom wanted me to come down for dinner. I nod and set the violin back on the stand.

We head downstairs. Mom’s still at the stove with her favorite red pot. She tells us she made chili and gives us both a bowl. Rin goes to the cupboard and gets out the crackers. I take both our bowls to the table. We eat in silence for a bit, then Rin says something and I lightly smack the back of her head because of it.

— <> — <> — <> —

I blink a few times. Was that a memory? I don’t have time to think anymore though, Rin’s finished tuning. I take the instrument back and start to play one of the scales from the memory. My fingers made their way across the fingerboard as if it was natural. Rin watches as it happens, her eyes wide and tear-filled.

She lets out a small chuckle. “Even without your memory, you always practice the same scales…”

Should I tell her? I probably should. “A-actually… when you were tuning it for me, I remembered a time I played these scales…” Her eyes widen.

“You… remember?”

“Only a little. I came home from school. Mom was in the kitchen. I went upstairs and played the instrument. You came in and watched me until I asked what you wanted. You said mom told you to come tell me dinner was ready. We went downstairs and ate chili and crackers. Then you said something and I smacked the back of your head.” Rin, after making sure the instrument wasn’t in the way, hugs me.

“You remembered something! You actually remembered something! The doctor said there was a chance but I almost didn’t believe it!” She pulls away and grabs the instrument. She places it back on the stand and grabs my arm. “We need to tell mom!” Before I can respond, I’m whisked down the stairs. Just like in my memory, Mom is in the kitchen. “Mom! Mom! She remembered something! Already!”

Mom looks at us, hand covering her mouth, trying not to cry for — at least — the third time today. “Is it true? You remembered something?” I nod and she crushes me in a hug once more. “My baby is coming back. Slowly, but still coming back.”

“Hopefully the rest of her memories follow close behind.” Rin says, joining in on the hug.

— <> — <> — <> —

It took a while — and a surprise visit from my ex — for most of my memories to come back. Some seem to have left for good. I am Anne Simmons. I like to read, play my violin, and drink coffee. I have 2 best friends named Georgia and Mary. We only used to hang out every once in a while but after we reconnected, since the accident made me forget about them, we’ve begun to hang out more frequently. I’ve had 5 exes, 4 guys and 1 girl, as far as my memory allows me to remember. Alan was the worst out of all of them by far. I could tell why I hate flowers so much just from his surprise visit.

I’m currently enrolled in college and work mostly night shifts at the local convenience store. Rin and Mom are great, I’m happy they’ve been here for me. I don’t know where I’d be without them. No matter how annoying little sisters can be at times. Or how overbearing moms can be. Without them, my life wouldn’t be complete.