"Mikaylaaaaaa, let me iiiin!! I wanna plaaaaay."
I smacked both of my hands against the wooden door of my sister’s bedroom, moaning and wailing, the sound echoing in the compact air of the hallway, until she whipped the door open and out of my grasp.
“Oh my god, Maddie!”
Her half whisper, half shout instantly confirmed my fears.
“Go. Away!” she said. “How many times do I have to tell you. Anna’s here, go play by yourself, we’re busy.”
Through the doorway, I could see the beanie-babies sitting on the floor of her bedroom, looking abandoned and waiting for their animator to come back. Anna caught my eyes and smiled at me.
Mikayla looked back briefly into her room, following my gaze, and looked back only to slam the door in my face. I stood in place for a few moments and felt the tears well up in my eyes, then shambled the few steps back to my room.
I walked over to the closet, pulled out a marker and a small scrap of pink construction paper, and proceeded to write an eloquent and well thought out letter to my sister consisting of how I felt about her and her title of “older sister.”

I HATE You SOOOOOOOOO Much.
You Are The Worst Sister EVer!!!!!!!!!! :(

Without putting down the marker, I grabbed the letter and stormed over to my sister’s bedroom. I did my best to gather all of my rage and store it in the paper, then mustered my courage and slid it under the door. At that point, the goal was no longer to play with the big kids, but I wanted her to know how she made me feel. I wanted her to feel guilty.
A small part of me wanted to linger outside the door for a moment, to see if she would come out and change her mind, but after approximately ten seconds I heard laughter emanate from the room.
Instead of bursting in and giving her the talking-to she really deserved, I made my way to my bed and sat.
There was nothing I could do.

—

“Hey Mikayla, can I play? Pretty please?”
We had just recently attained a GameCube, and although we had more than one controller, we both wanted to play the coveted one-player game, Sonic Adventure Battle 2.
“No.”
“Pleeeeease?” I whined.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because. Go away.”
“But I wanna plaayy.” I sat on the floor next to her and pushed against her shoulder, rocking her back and forth.
“No.”
“Fine.”
I sighed heavily.
This was a normal occurrence. There wasn’t much I could do to force her off the game; she would just knock me over and rip the controller out of my hands.
I got to my feet, defeated, and stood there mesmerized by the screen for a good thirty seconds before wandering off. But, after about ten minutes, I wandered right back. This time, however, I was determined.
“Mikayla it’s my turn now, you’ve been on for ever.”
“Mmmmm, how about no.”
I pushed her, but she didn’t budge.
“Mikaylaaaaa, let me onnnn!” I whined.
I pushed her again and tried to grab the controller out of her hand, and she pulled it away from my reach, her eyes still fixated on the screen. I tried again, but to no avail. This time around, she was fed up with my obnoxious antics. Mikayla knocked me over and sat on me, smiling while I squirmed and cried.
“Mikayla get off!” I attempted to shove her off and failed.
Nothing.
“Mikayla stop it, get off of me!”
My childish squeal was piercing.
My dad couldn’t hear me this time, he was outside using the blower.
“Stoooopp!” I screamed.
I could barely get the words out between my sobs and the pressure on my chest, crushing my arm awkwardly beneath me.
“I can’t breathe, Mikayla!”
I finally stopped struggling, and without saying anything, she stood up and went back to the game. I clambered to my feet and ran out of the room, tears rolling down my face.
Dad would know how to fix this.

—


I followed the sound of the blower out to the back patio, and saw my dad on the far side of it from the door. He had on his old red earmuffs and the tan jacket with the denim sleeves he wore whenever he worked outside. I ran over to him, and when he saw my face, he turned off the engine and took off his earmuffs as quick as he could.

“Sweetie, what’s wrong? What happened?”

“Dad, Mikayla wouldn’t let me play and I wanted to and she said no, and” —I gulped in a breath— “she hit me and sat on me and I couldn’t breathe and my arm hurts and she’s mean and I hate her.”

I stood there whimpering, my hands at my sides.

“Awwwww, sweetie. shhhh, it’s okay,” he said, kneeling down and gathering me up in his arms, trapping mine at my sides. He held me, rocking me back and forth as I breathed in the familiar smell of cut grass and gasoline. When my sniffles finally subsided, he placed his hands on my shoulders and held me at arm’s length, looking right at my face.

“You know Maddie, let me tell you something. I think your sister is really only looking for a reaction. That’s all she wants! She wants you to react because it’s entertaining.”
On this last word he poked me in the chest, and I looked up.

“So if you don’t react, she’ll get bored, and leave you alone. Eventually she won’t even bother. How about that?”

I didn’t say anything.

—

I walked in three minutes before nine.

8:57 AM
Thanks for filling up the car Mikayla
I would’ve been late to school if there was any traffic at all


I received her response during lunch, sighed, and put my phone back in my pocket.


12:12 PM
Thanks for being a giant b**** about it :)