“What do you plan to do this summer?” asked my best friend Darren. Darren had been the first person to talk to me when I moved to Pelican Cove, and consequently was my best friend. I didn’t respond staring over the heads of the chattering crowd and over at a girl who stood talking to her friends.
“I don’t know. Nothing I expect.” I continued to gaze in the girl’s direction.
Darren looked over to where I was looking. “You need to get over her, date someone else. She’s not going to forgive you.”
“I know, but it’s just hard,” I said remembering what happened only a week ago.
“I know you’re upset but get a grip. You need to get a summer fling or something. Date someone else, have some fun, mess around. You’re acting like someone died.”
I died on the inside, I thought but didn’t voice it out loud.
“You have dated plenty of girls and never had this problem, why is she any different?”
That was perfectly true, I had dated plenty of girls, and had horrible break-ups, but somehow, Lilly was different. When I had dated other girls, I never really cared. They were just things that made you a man. It let you into the popular crowd. I had never really had feelings for any of the girls I dated except for Lilly.

Lilly was tall, willowy, and had a beautiful body. Her brunette hair usually curled slightly. She smiled a lot, and seemed to never get mad. I had loved her, and even though we started just as friends, our relationship seemed to grow more and more, until finally, I asked her out. We dated throughout the year and in the winter, she invited me to her dad’s cabin in Denver, and I saw something I hadn’t seen for many years, snow. It was all too good to be true.
A week ago, I went to Darren’s party. I never meant to get drunk, it just happened. One minute I was flirting inadvertently with another girl, and before I knew it I was kissing her. Lilly had walked in at that moment, and the fight that followed would haunt me for the rest of my life.
She was close to tears as she cried, yelling at me.
“What are you doing?” she had said.
“I…” I stammered. I was drunk, but somehow was aware of what she was saying.
“I can’t believe you would use me like this. I thought you loved me, but I guess I’m just like every other girl you’ve dated. Just something else…just another item…”
“I—you’re different!” I burst out loud.
“What makes me different from every other girl, just give me one example!”
“I…you…I…” I was dazed. I heard a sob as she ran out of the house. It was silent, everyone was watching me…
At home I started to throw up, the consequence of the alcohol taking place in my body. However, I had a strange suspicion that it wasn’t the only thing that had made me feel sick. The next day I awoke at noon. It was a Saturday, and even though I had a terrible headache, I dragged myself out of bed. Finding my phone I texted Lilly.
"Hey. Sorry about last night. Please Forgive Me."
She never responded back. Now as I stood in the cafeteria I wondered if she hated me, or if she hated the fact that she loved me. I did love her, and I wanted to fix things, if there was only a way to convince her.
“Hey, I will be right back,” and before Darren could argue I made my way toward her and her friend. She gave him one look of deep disgust before turning around and walking away.
“She seriously doesn’t want to talk to you,” said her friend.
“I know, I wanted to talk to you, not her…how can I convince her to talk to me?” I asked slowly. She looked at me scathingly.
“There’s nothing you can do, what’s done is done, and nothing can change that.” She moved away, but I caught her wrist and turned her around. “What?”
“What makes a girl happy?” I said. “What can make her smile, and perhaps make her feel different…about the boy?”
“Girls are like boys, they have the same emotions and thoughts, less creepy though,” she added. “What makes you happy, makes girls happy, that’s why you date people with the same interest…what makes you both happy?” She brushed the hair out of her eyes.
“Well,” I said looking down, “ when we dated I remember sitting under a tree with her doing our math homework, I couldn’t help but stare at her…she’s smart…and poetic…I am poetic, I mean I don’t know, I love her, but…she doesn’t love me.” I said, feeling stupid for admitting this.
“I wouldn’t be so sure, you have to show that you love her, telling her is not enough, you have to be deep with her. Saying I love you is not enough, you have to be supportive and patient. You said you like to write? Write a letter telling her how much you love her.”
That night I sat with a pen poised in my hand and tried to think of something to tell her.

Lilly, I’m sorry that I hurt you, you mean so much to me, but I wish we You are pretty and smart, but you make me feel like an idiot whenever I talk to you because your so happy and I I love you so much, but I can’t understand why-

I threw my first attempt in the trash, but every time I tried to write something, I felt stupid, and more tactless. Finally at three o’clock in the morning an idea stuck me. What if…yes of course…and I began to write again.
Monday was an exciting day for the school because it was the beginning of the last week of school. I held the note in my sweaty hand, and looked for Lilly, finally spotting her talking to the same friend I had asked for advice. I walked over feeling as though I was walking toward my death.
“Hi, this is for you,” I said handing her the note. She took it, and I said, “Don’t open it until you’re ready…”
I left them feeling embarrassed, hoping against hope that she wouldn’t throw it away.
Lilly looked at the note folded up and moved her hand toward the trashcan.
“Don’t throw it away,” said her friend.
“Excuse me?” said Lilly said incredulously clutching the paper in her hand.
“I said don’t throw it away. Read it, please.”
There was something in her friends voice that startled Lilly. I watched Lilly opened it and read it. I saw her eyes slowly move down the list. No emotion crossed her face as she read it, but I swear even to this day that a smile had flitted across her face. She put the note in her pocket and headed to class.
All that day I couldn’t concentrate on my school work. I was still thinking about the letter. She had looked at it, but what would she say. Would she say anything at all? These thoughts ran through my head and I could barely see where I was going until at the end of the day I bumped into someone. “Sorry,” I said. It was Lilly. I felt my heart skip a beat, she had the note in her hand. She handed it to me and whispered, read it.
I hastened to open it, and read:

Hey Lilly,

I’m sorry about that night and I know I don’t deserve to be forgiven. You asked me, however, to tell you how you’re different from other girls. You asked me to give you one example, I’m giving you ten.

1.You’re as beautiful on the outside as you are on the inside.
2.Your kind to everyone, even people you don’t like.
3.You find the beauty in others, and when I am around you, you make me feel beautiful.
4.Even on my worst days you make me laugh.
5.When we were fourteen and we sat under the tree just as friends doing our homework, I couldn’t help but stare at you.
6.You can make light of any situation.
7.Sometimes when I walk around at night. I think of you, and I lose track of time, when I realize where I am, I’m at your house, and I know that it’s a sign that I need you.
8.When you stand in the snow, you look like an angel.
9.I miss you.
10.I love you.

When you’ve read this, and you’re ready, call me. Logan.

At the bottom of it there was a note in Lilly’s handwriting, it was only a few words but it made his heart feel as light as air.

I love you too.