R-E-T-A-R-D, what does that spell? Popular!

Or so I thought. If I wasn’t judging on looks (but you shouldn’t judge on that, and not for the reason you think-some popular people at my school have so much acne they make me want to hurl), the only thing that I thought that popular people had in common was being dumb. I mean, they certainly don’t all take a certain sport or class, (though cheerleading is helpful). The only thing that I had in my arsenal to group this lucky clique together was the fact that none of them got straight-A’s.

Now, I know straight-A’s is a pretty high standard, even for people in my super competitive school. But I can almost safely say that none of them get straight-B’s, either.

It makes sense, actually. You never see the popular people talking about tests, unless they tell everyone they got an F on it. And in the rare instances that they say something revolving around a test, they don’t want to have a friend that brags about how they got a higher score. They want someone able to say “At least you didn’t get a 47%. Mrs. _____ sucks!”

So does that mean that smart kids will never be popular? Is there something in our genes that makes us unable to be surrounded by groupies and hot guys?

No. It’s because we think of ourselves too highly. We aren’t willing to really stretch ourselves down the perilous track of popularity. How many of us would do drugs to be popular? Alcohol? I don’t know about you, but I cannot see myself doing any of those things just for a rise in the social ladder. That’s why I’m doing every LEGAL thing under the sun to be popular. While this may involve some tanning lotion and a lot of waxing, I’m not willing to risk my life for the game of popularity.

I know, I know. Do you want love? Or you want fame? Are you in the game? Yes, I’m in the game! Just not killing myself for my entry slot.
I believe that smart kids can be popular if they, well, hide their smarts. When somebody asks you what you got on a test, shrug and mumble noncommittally on how a certain teacher sucks. NEVER and I repeat NEVER ask somebody what they got on a test outright. If they don’t ask you, it means they don’t want to share. If asked what your grades are, look over the person. Smart? Tell them, but not in a bragging way? Below Average? Say ‘Better than last semester,’ or , ‘Enough to make my mom mad,’ chances are you’ll get a laugh from them, and maybe slide your way into the conversation.

Oh, and nobody likes a teacher’s pet. Period. (Unless you’re looking for someone to write you a recommendation. In which case, flatter the heck out of that teacher- but not in public moments. Wait until the end of class. Not after school, though. You’ve got to talk to your zombie populars, and I heard that teacher slime is hard to get rid of after school!)