What Matters | Teen Ink

What Matters

March 12, 2008
By Anonymous

Valentine’s Day, some like it alot and some hate it the most out of all holidays. For me it’s a bitter sweet memory. I woke up like any other day and went to school but something felt different, I couldn’t put my figure on it but something was definitely different. Third hour went by and it seemed like the day was going by on turbo speed. Lunch was good, but it wasn’t the same. I noticed Ali wasn’t there and so we sat and ate, but it wasn’t the same. Lunch ended, and the five minute bell rang. I went to my locker, things were defiantly weird today. I knew something was wrong I just could feel it.
Ashley came up to me red in her face and tears down her checks and told me the news. I couldn’t hold it back, I started to cry. I didn’t care if it was school, I couldn’t hold it in. I gathered my stuff slowly trying to whip the black mascara spread all around my eyes and down my checks away. I walked into class about 20 seconds late; Mrs. Ramesh was in the hall talking to a teacher so she didn’t notice. I sat down at my table trying my best not to burst out crying, but that didn’t go very well. Hannah the girl sitting to the right of me asked what was wrong, that was when I cracked and told her the terrible news as I started to cry again. Mrs. Ramash saw me crying and loudly said, "Rachael hallway Now", I gathered my thoughts but there was nothing to gather the only words stuck in my head was Ashley’s terrified voice saying “he’s dead!” I looked the other way so no one saw my tears and left to the hall. She came out seconds after and asked, "What’s wrong peanut" in a reassuring voice. I told her the news that Ashley had informed me about. I could see her bright smile fade to a dim sad frown, "let me take you to the consoling office," she said.
We arrived to the consoling office and Mrs. Powers sat to talk to me. My mind was a blurr, I couldn’t talk after what had happened. I just wanted to talk to Ali and make her feel better; Mrs. Powers was about to let me call her when Mr. Boman informed her that Ali was here in the office to visit. We hugged and mores tears poured out, I was begging to think the tears would never stop. I stayed there with some other friends of Alis for the rest of the day talking to her, trying to make her feel better in the conference room in the office. Within a couple minutes we were making her laugh and smile again.

That day I had a volleyball game against Jenison. Everyone was nervous, accept for me. I was so out of it, how could I do my best when so much was wrong? I was in another world were I was left alone with no one, and I had no thoughts, no voice, no mind. I didn’t start the game. I was a sub for Elliana. We were up to serve and it was my serve. It seemed as though the nerves escaped me and the pressure was completely off. There was a small part of me angry but the rest was in misery. This was it. We were a couple points behind maybe 7 or 8 if I could get these serves back we would win the second match and have a better chance at the game. I stepped close to the line. I thought to myself, “this one is for Ali and all of the thin s she’s been through.” I hit the ball over the net with a perfect thud. The other team could not return my serves, it was like they took a vacation in lala land or something. I ended up serving 18 serves over for points in total, and we won the game. Through this entire experience I have learned that more than anything friend’s matter. They are there to wipe away the tears, help you forget about the pain, to make you smile. In memory of Scott Erbes may he rest in peace.

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