I woke.

The dream seemed so ephemeral. No matter how I desperately clung to the last shreds of the euphoria that I had fleetingly been in, it passed. The vast emptiness that envelopes me every waking hour came again, all-encompassing, taking away all rational thought. Already I was beginning to forget what had precisely happened. All I know is she had come back. An angel, a goddess, the light that once guided me through my darkest nights. But I was a fool to have mistaken it for reality. How could I hope against hope that she would be here, when we have already said our last goodbye?

We were happy once. Hands linked, we walked side-by-side on sunlit avenues, pausing only to appreciate the scenery. Well, at least she did. I simply watched her profile, noticing how her aura seemed to be the only thing that lit up the world. No tree, no stream, no piece of rock could ever compare. Every touch, every smile, she gave the world an unimaginable vibrancy and the very air seemed to hum around her. Back then, I couldn’t imagine a life without her. I still can’t. But in the end she still left.

She didn’t say why, but she didn’t need to. How could I, a plain human, be worthy of her attention? I still remember that day as she stood before me, a wisp of hair floating in the lazy summer air, suffusing the sunlight into a soft glow, telling me she is leaving. Something shattered in me then, something that has no hope of being fixed.

Some say it is like having a hole torn open in the fabric of your existence. They cannot be more wrong. I had no existence without her, only a negative of my former life. How can a hole exist when there is no fabric for it to exist upon? I only lived in memories with her, oblivious to my surroundings, hoping nothing would call my attention to the bleak and uninteresting present. Dreams often came, and though some woke me with silent suffocation, I still welcomed them, hoping some would turn out the way reality never would.

A knock at the door shattered my reverie. I debated about not getting it, and decided it would only cause more trouble than necessary. Hence I shuffled to the door in this walking nightmare and opened it. For a moment, my brain couldn’t comprehend what it was seeing. Can illusions be this real? There she stood, her enchanting presence illuminating the doorway. It couldn't be her. Yet, there she was, a vision from the past. Words eluded me, and I stared in disbelief. Her eyes met mine, and a familiar warmth enveloped my soul. Silence hung in the air, pregnant with unspoken emotions. I finally managed to find my voice, uttering her name as a question, a plea. She smiled, a bittersweet curve of her lips, and whispered softly, "I couldn't let go. I couldn't forget."

I woke.