I held the blade between my fingers, the cool of the metal radiating into my fear and anger. I had to do it, I had to. Taking a step forward, I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding in. It was dark outside, so dark I couldn’t see three feet in front of me. My cheeks were on fire, if there ever was anyone to see me; I bet they could see my cheeks ignite.
I kept the blade at my side, holding it close to my pant leg. Jeez, I shoulda worn shorts. I took another step forward, shaking all of my insecurities off. His house was dark, no lights coming from anywhere inside. The porch light was light. But I hugged the shadows, staying as far away from the light as possible.
I had to climb over the back fence; I knew that it wasn’t too high and that they kept their dog in a crate at night. Once, I climbed over I walked around to the back door. As I had hoped, the back door was unlocked, like always.
I took another deep breath and turned the knob, slowly and quietly. The door pushed back, allowing me to enter through. A new wave of anger washed through me as I walked through the living room, towards where he rest. He deserved to die for what he had done. A horrible, bloody death.
His room was down the hall I was currently ascending. I put a death grip on his door with my eyes. The closer I got, the more this felt like a good idea. A brilliant idea at that. That son of a b**** got what was coming to him.
I opened his bedroom door, silently stepping inside and closing the door behind me. I had to admire his beautiful body and hair. The way his heart still beat in his chest. God, he’s really hot.
I bent over his bed, making sure he was still sleeping. I was so glad he was a heavy sleeper.
My hand was shaking and my heart was beating a thousand miles a minute. I couldn’t do this, I could, I couldn’t.
Get over yourself! I thought to myself. I held the tip of the knife to his chest, ready to plunge it in and stop his heart from beating forever. But I couldn’t.

I grabbed a paper from his top desk drawer and wrote him a note. Then I ran.

J,
I’m sorry. I’m not a bad person. I love you too much to hurt you. Im so sorry.
<3 K