Lessons in life come in mysterious ways. True lessons in life come at the most unexpected moments, but when used to the advantage of another conflict, they can be a great aspect of maturity.
Unexpected moments in life tend to leave an array of emotions behind. Unfortunately enough, some are not as pleasing as some people would hope them to be; some involve the division of a family and the loss of a best friend. Feelings of loss are often equivalent to the loneliness of lonesomeness.
When your parents gather you and your sister around the living room for a “family discussion,” the feelings of being lost can become overbearing; the reason being is you know what is about to happen. Anyone could tell something was wrong by the way they their faces were taut, how serious they were, and the grave expression on their faces when they said, “We are getting a divorce.” I began to fill my head with questions of worry; “Why my family?” and “Why is life so unfair? What did I do that made all of this so wrong?”
In less than half of a year, my life had gone from a regular home, to my parents divorced, my mom remarried, and my dad dating another woman. Confusion became a regular thing to me. If I was not confused, I was safe in my own streaming dreams while sleeping. To make it even stranger, the woman my father had been seeing was the complete opposite of the man that my mother had remarried. Jason was a simple man. He gave my mom everything she asked, yet I despised him. Neither of us knew why, but he seemed to not appeal to me like Jen did. Jen was an extremely creative and outgoing woman who held her head high though the toughest of challenges. She inspired me daily and constantly made me fell accepted. She soon became my best friend, only to be taken away in what seemed to be a blink of an eye.
Emotions became complex and thick in the air at home. My house had gone from the sacred haven I once loved, to a place I dreaded to be and attempted to avoid at all costs. As my dad and his girlfriend’s relationship dwindled, my friendship with her grew stronger. We would text every day and would seldom go for a girl’s day out. Looking back, I believe I knew that threads were holding her and my father together. I forced everything in my power to hold her in my life. But holding Jen in my life during that time was like trying to hold a single grain of sand in a wind storm; no matter how strong you are, the wind was more powerful than your grip. And, as sad as I am to say, their breakup was extremely dreadful in the eyes of those around, except my mother’s. My father and mother soon decided to rekindle their love at the small price of my friendship. After receiving this news, the next thing my parents decided to surprise me with was the hasty decision to allow me no contact with Jen. The words of my father played in my head as a daily reminder. “I don’t want you talking to her or communicating with her at all. I have also blocked her from your phone so she can’t text or call you.” Not knowing how to cope with things, I began a frenzy of rage toward my parents and sibling in which they soon returned. “You’re such a drama queen,” my mom would scream at me without any hesitance. But with the tragic breakup soon came a bright thought. I thought back to the questions I should have been asking. “What could I learn from this? Everything happens for a reason right?”
When used for the right reasons, unexpected moments like these can be learned from, resulting in other obstacles in life seeming like less of a challenge. I was soon faced with a similar problem between friends. Because I had gone through this obstacle with my parents, I knew what actions to make without causing emotional stress, a screaming match, and most importantly, without allowing a heart to be broken. The calamity of the situation was avoided.
We may not understand life, but it’s His will that is the ultimate goal is it not? That must have been God’s plan for all of the chaos the past year. And maybe other tasks are going to be thrown directly into my face. But whatever they may be, God will show me why “Life is not fair.”