Adrenaline runs through my veins. Goosebumps line my back and arms. I’m waiting in line for my turn. There are three people in front of me. I wonder if they get the same feeling I get before I step on the board. Or am I alone in this? I take a deep breath, filling first my stomach then my lungs. In through my nose, out through my mouth. I’ll make it through this.
Why I have problems with this dive, I don’t know. I have done it over 100 times before. My mind is trained and my body will follow. But how to make that happen is the problem. My thoughts are all over the place. What if… I smack or I hit the board. I can’t do this dive, back out now. You’re a coward. The thoughts are everything but positive. I need to take control of them. Somehow, I’ll make it through this.
Now there is only one person in front of me. The pressure rises to a whole new level. I try to distract myself from the pessimistic thoughts in my head and focus on my breathing. I look over at my coach and she knows I am nervous. She mouths to me to relax and be confident. I look to my mom in the crowd, I can see her talking to herself and her hands in clenched fists. There is a lot riding on this dive. I’ll make it through this.
The diver in front of me lands in the water and her scores are read off.. 5, 6, 5. It’s my turn. I step on the board and set my fulcrum to 4. I can feel the ridges and cool surface of the board on my feet, it’s a reassuring feeling. To everyone else I appear confident, but inside my stomach is in knots. Chin held high I walk to the end of the board. I turn around facing the wall and put my toes on the edge of the board. I take one deep breath and my feet leave the board. Suddenly there is a rush of water surrounding me. I made it.